Originally Posted by reinventmyself
I've had a few breakups under my belt and as much as it's nothing to be proud of, I know what to expect.
I try to look at it like an alcoholic or drug addict going through a detox. The beginning it always the hardest as you go through withdrawals.
Each time you take a drink, a recovering alcoholic will have to start all over again. So if you think about it that way, there is some motivation to resist the urge to check and or drive by. All the pain you feel right now is basically for nothing and you have to start all over again. i don't know about you, but once is enough for me. So be kind to yourself and resist going backwards.
Recognize it's going to be bad for a while. No surprises. It really hurts, but it won't kill you. I have learned to basically sit in the middle of it cry, vent, whatever and let it pass through me.
Distractions are good and bad, because if you distract yourself too much, the grief is always there waiting for you to process it. You deal with it, or it deals with you. Better off leaning into it and getting it over with.
I am sorry you are hurting.
Reading your words take me back to some not so good times.
But it does pass. It always does
And . . .when you're ready and willing, you will find love again.
Hang in there.
Come here and vent anytime.
If you feel tempted and don't trust yourself, come here first or call a friend.