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Thread: I just need to vent

  1. #1
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    I just need to vent

    Today I'm having a challenging day.

    As you know I'm working in another country and I'm living alone here far away from my family and friends. I'm very lucky to be here, to learn so much every day, to have met the people I've met (they are not many, but I've met a few people I really like) and I have a good job with a good salary, something that I was very hard to get in my country. I'm not complaining as this was my choice and I don't regret it in the greater scheme of things, but some days I feel incredibly lonely despite spending the whole day talking to patients and colleagues.

    The work volume has been crazy to a point that it's hardly manageable. We have several sick or maternity leave colleagues and I have so much responsibility sometimes and so much on me (because of the lack of people and the "fantastic" decision of my company in letting us work understaff for so long and taking so long to find replacements to save money, but I digress) that I've been feeling very anxious again. Sometimes I feel sick, I can't sleep properly and all this stress and pressure are getting to me to the point of it reflecting on the quality of my work (not anything serious, but I notice that). And I have to endure this until September which is when I'll have holidays and visit home. On top of this I'm working on a third language which I've improved a lot and have professional fluency in, but still makes it all even more tiring.

    So today I was feeling very stressed (and irritated). My boss asked me to work several days a week at another place (it's normal to "loan" professionals to other places of the same chain), which made me very nervous because I'm already stressed at a place I'm used to (my workplace), and now I have to be stressed at a place I don't know with people I don't know with services I'm not used to. My usual self would see this as a learning opportunity and a good challenge and chance to network, which it is, but this added up to my stress. Also, I'm responsible for a very sensitive and important service at work that I need to be on top of and pay very close attention to because mistakes can happen and they're dangerous but I hardly have time because I have million other things to do and some colleagues well, don't help. So having to work at two places for a while and keep the same function at the same time it's not ok.

    So I talked to my boss calmly and told him that yes, I would work both at this place and the other place (I could refuse as I'm not obligated, but the smartest decision is to accept and he had already told them I was the best person to help them because of my experience in some services that my colleagues have not) but under one condition, he needs to get someone to help me at that service I'm responsible for as I'm not capable and are not given conditions to perform a good job and that I don't feel safe working on something so sensitive under these conditions, when I am responsible for so many other things at the same time and so many people depend on me and interrupt me so many times and the amount of patients we have now is insane. He said he totally agreed with me and that he himself would help me and support me and that I'd be able to divide my share of that work with him or someone else.

    I should be relieved but I just came home and cried. And today I almost bursted in tears at work when I made a mistake (nothing important, just registered something wrong which made a colleague waste time looking for it).

    I had planned to study the language today as I've decided to take an official exame to prove my level at the language and my writing is too weak for that exam and I had also planned on studying some stuff for work, but I've spent the afternoon crying in the sofa and can't focus.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Take it easy on yourself. You did the right thing. Sometimes very conscientious people get a touch of burn-out. Do something for yourself. Sheer indulgence whatever that may be. You can always get back to being perfect tomorrow.😊

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    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    Wow. You have a lot on your plate.

    Is it possible to cut down your hours? If you feel that your anxiety is affecting the quality of your work, maybe you should consider if this job is worth all of the stress. Can you take your skills and work someplace less stressful?

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SarahLancaster
    Wow. You have a lot on your plate.

    Is it possible to cut down your hours? If you feel that your anxiety is affecting the quality of your work, maybe you should consider if this job is worth all of the stress. Can you take your skills and work someplace less stressful?
    I think I can, the only limiting factor here is that I'm foreigner, therefor in bigger cities (where I'd like to live) it's harder to compete with locals which I totally understand. Which is why I've decided to take that official language exam to have more chances. I think I can do a good work because I'm very hard working and people in general like my work, but sometimes I make stupid mistakes because of stress and the volume of work but I think it's also due to being exhausted and not resting properly. I have 33 extra hours on my work time balance that I can use to take some free days but we're so understaffed and so many people will have holidays now, that my boss prefers that I wait a little until we have more people to use those hours (it's a lot of money they have to pay me if I don't use them, but at the same time I can't use them soon because we're understaffed even though they want me to use them lol ). I haven't exactly cut my hours but I stopped saying yes to making extra shifts when they need, because even though that money is very useful to me, I think my mental health and rest are more important. So now I'm working less hours than the previous months, but the amount of work in the hours I work is insane. If the other place I'll be working a couple days a week doesn't make me die of nerves (lol), I think it'll be a breath of fresh air and it's located in a nice place.


    I think it'll get better, it's just that today everything seems dark and hopeless.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Take it easy on yourself. You did the right thing. Sometimes very conscientious people get a touch of burn-out. Do something for yourself. Sheer indulgence whatever that may be. You can always get back to being perfect tomorrow.😊
    Thank you, sometimes I'm too hard on myself and get too anxious.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    God I know the stress too....When I do, I go home, kick off my work boots, have a couple of beers. Sometime just doing nothing, and letting it all go even if it's for 8 hours, can bring your sanity back. if it gets bad and I think I'm losing it, I phone in sick for a couple of days to be me again...sleep, watch some movies, go out for lunch, internet shop. If you keep saying yes, that pile of responsibility keeps growing bigger. Learn to say no once in awhile. They sure ain't gonna fire you when they are so short staffed.
    Just screw it, and get some rest...it will keep as my dad would say.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    God I know the stress too....When I do, I go home, kick off my work boots, have a couple of beers. Sometime just doing nothing, and letting it all go even if it's for 8 hours, can bring your sanity back. if it gets bad and I think I'm losing it, I phone in sick for a couple of days to to be me again...sleep, watch some movies, go out for lunch, internet shop. If you keep saying yes, that pile of responsibility keeps growing bigger. Learn to say no once in awhile. They sure ain't gonna fire you when they are so short staffed.
    Even if they wanted to fire me (which they don't), it's very hard and expensive to fire someone here. I love my team in general, but I know of other workplaces where it's a mess and bosses can't do anything about it or people call in sick all at the same time lol

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    You did well talking to your boss.

    You've overcome many challenges. You are doing very well :)

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Sounds like a glass of wine (or in my case, a night of sugar-free gummy bears) and a movie are in order, sister. You need way more time to relax and consciously spend more time on you. Sometimes even in our rest periods, we tend to overthink and worry about the next day, our families and the work ahead or even the work we've already done. That all needs to stop. You have to know when to tune out and put a cork in it. I agree with the pat on the back being honest with your boss. You're not going to get any studying done with all this swirling around tonight so let that go. Rest up and like they say, be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor the next morning, the devil says 'Oh sh-! She's up.'

    One day at a time.

  11. #10
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    Damn, you are going to burn yourself out and get sick. How many hours do you work in a week?

    Are they going to hire more people?

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