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Thread: Onward.

  1. #111
    Platinum Member WithLove's Avatar
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    Just getting caught up with your life in the last month. Sooo happy to hear that you got into grad school! There was never any doubt that you would. I'm proud of you!

    So, did you do anything special for your birthday? I also turned 30 on the 28th, and it was lowkey. I went to bed early that day, lol. I did have a really nice dinner with my mom and a couple friends, though, and that was really nice.

  2. #112
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    I worked up til my birthday. My family took me out to a nice steak dinner. I proceeded to go home and drank a LOT of wine. The room was spinning when I went to sleep. Overall I had a good time. I'm so happy I'm 30. This will be a decade to remember.

  3. #113
    Platinum Member WithLove's Avatar
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    I feel the same way! Most of my 20s were awful. I can't wait to see how my 30s will be. I'm really hoping to find peace and get on a stable path.

  4. #114
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    HBD, Fudgie.

    I'll always remember my 30th, now basically exactly 10 years in the past. Good night with friends that ended with me walking home alone as the sun came up through a chilly and misty Brooklyn, my brain contentedly fuzzy by the previous few hours. I remember thinking something like: Oh, now I get it—I'm just going to do a bunch of stuff until I can't do stuff anymore...

    Point being, I think a lot of us inevitably look at our 20s as the decade where we're supposed to "figure it out." Lock down the job, the friends, the partner, the 401K, the this, the that—all before the bell of 30 rings. Whoa, dizzying. And, of course, so far from true. Weird how 20somethings kind of treat their life like people preparing for retirement, as opposed to a thing that is, literally and figuratively, just beginning.

    I found my 30s so refreshing because the weight of consequence started to lift, kept getting lighter as the decade passed, and the weight came to be replaced with something like peace. You just do stuff—job this, love that, and so on—and you just keep doing it. Along the way there are peaks and plummets, successes and failures, but it always adds up to the same thing: a life, which at 30 is still just getting started.

    My two cents to say: Cheers!

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  6. #115
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    Happy 30th!!!!

    And that's amazing about you starting grad school!

  7. #116
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Cheers to you all!

    Yes, being 30 is great. I really do love it. I've been contemplating about how this is the age that everyone perseverates on. "I want to be married by 30, I want a child by 30, I want to be in x job by 30, want to finish school by 30..."

    This number somehow holds a lot of significance. I've been living in the same apartment since my early 20s now. Both a lot and not much has changed for me. I'm still the same at my core.

    I'm actually pretty pleased with where I am today. My quality of life is pretty good and I feel like I'm finally independent in every sense of the word...from family, from a man, etc. I don't take this for granted.

  8. #117
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Well put.

    The part everyone forgets, when they’re hanging all those hats on the hook of 30, is what happens the day after you turn 30: you just keep living, likely for a long, long time.

    That’s what was so freeing for me. Looking back, I guess I see it as the beginning of realizing that certain things (job, woman, etc.) were never going to provide the thing I thought they would. Didn’t mean those things lost value. Maybe the opposite. More colors added to the spectrum, more depths to the waters.

    I’m not sure there is anything more edifying than a sense of independence. Bravo. Keep leaning into it all.

  9. #118
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Independence really does feel good. If I didn't get into grad school, at this point, I probably would have left my current job and done a few traveling assignments. But I have no regrets about that. I'm happy that I got into school.

    I definitely am a little more isolated right now than I was before I split with my recent ex. There are maybe 2 local friends that I like, talk to, and will see on occasion. I have yet to feel lonely. I feel like I always have someone to talk to if I need to and I guess that's what matters in the end.

  10. #119
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Recently, I went to a festival with family and made a spur of the moment purchase on some nice local art (framed). It was $200+ and I just saw it, it struck me, I thought of some wall space I'd place it on, and I bought it immediately. I only buy art that I want to see every single day because I keep it on the wall all the time.

    One of my aspirations was to be able to make enough money to do that and it felt so good to do that. I love good art. It was never a status thing for me, as I rarely have anyone over so the only one who is looking at it is me day after day. To be able to have the means to buy art like that for my own enjoyment, it's lovely.

    I am so very fortunate to be where I am today.

  11. #120
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Happy 30th!
    Many people are happy in their 30’s. It was another hated decade for me. I can’t say I ever really enjoyed my life until my 50’s.

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