MaceyMino Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I like my boyfriend a lot and we have been dating for over 3 months but he says I’m a bad kisser and has said that since our second date. I try to fix it but he says I don’t use my lips and I don’t know how to get any better. When I tell him it hurts my feelings he says I shouldn’t get offended and he’s being nice by trying to fix it. I would really like some tips. I don’t want to break up with him I just want to know how to be a better kisser. Link to comment
maew Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I like my boyfriend a lot and we have been dating for over 3 months but he says I’m a bad kisser and has said that since our second date. I try to fix it but he says I don’t use my lips and I don’t know how to get any better. When I tell him it hurts my feelings he says I shouldn’t get offended and he’s being nice by trying to fix it. I would really like some tips. I don’t want to break up with him I just want to know how to be a better kisser. He seems like a jerk, why would you put up with someone that critiques how you give affection? It's probably just a lack of chemistry OP and wouldn't matter what you do to "fix" this... he will find something else to criticize you about. Link to comment
kim42 Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I don’t know how old you are, you can google some tips on to how to kiss, but your boyfriend does not seem like a nice guy. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I'd have a sense of humour about it and tell him the reason you don't move your lips is because his breath smells like an unwashed urinal. I think he's toying with you. Don't let these things get to you. If he starts becoming more detailed and offensive about the issue, you know what to do. Link to comment
figureitout23 Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 Follow what he does. Agree. My first boyfriend was much more expierienced in kissing than i was, I let him lead and followed what he did, that’s how most if not all people learn their own techniques, well that and porn. Watch how he’s treating you though, this could potentially be a red flag, hard to tell now, but it could be. Link to comment
RedDress Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 If he’s not being mean and «just trying to fix it» - shouldn’t he be the one giving you tips and working with you on it? It can be totally fun and playful to teach or learn new techniques through trial and error and practice. ... but if he’s just telling you what’s wrong and hoping you’ll magically find a way to fix it yourself, he’s being borderline abusive, IMO. Link to comment
SherrySher Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I'd have a sense of humour about it and tell him the reason you don't move your lips is because his breath smells like an unwashed urinal. I think he's toying with you. Don't let these things get to you. :0 No, don't do that. Just practice more ;) Try to follow what he does, as people have mentioned.Try different techniques. Make sure he's not being mean though. If he keeps criticising you then it's time to find a new boyfriend. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 I think it's a fine line between being serious when someone treats another person poorly and another one being able to take a joke or laugh something off. I agree with RedDress that his behaviour is borderline emotionally manipulative and quite callous if it's serious, repetitive or it gets a bit out of hand with the comments. I wouldn't even buy into naivete for this. I chose not to go the overanalyzing route in my earlier post but since it may be misinterpreted on a one-dimensional screen, I'll refine my response: If he wants to play in a hot kitchen, boy better make sure he can take the heat, imo. To the OP: you don't need to make him realize anything. A good man will come to his own conclusions about you and someone compatible and caring will know how to behave around his partner. You do your part and he should do his. Otherwise, I reiterate, you should know what to do. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 He's not being "nice trying to fix it" he's being critical and insensitive. The best way to be a better kisser is to dump this jerk and find a better teacher.When I tell him it hurts my feelings he says I shouldn’t get offended and he’s being nice by trying to fix it. Link to comment
SherrySher Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 What if they're just young kids and are still learning? No need to tell them to go to war. He might not even realize that he's going about it the wrong way and she's just learning too. I don't think it's time to name call and get super upset. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 There's no such as a bad kisser. We all have preferences on how we like to kiss and be kissed. You're likely just incompatible when it comes to kissing. You may kiss someone else, and he will think he's gone to heaven. Judging by your boyfriend's behaviour, that might be your best move. Link to comment
Billie28 Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 I kissed a guy once and it was bad!!!! He is now happily married to a friend of mine for 15 years and have two kids. I only met her through him and we became friends as in I am in contact with her now and not really him , she doesn’t know we kissed. But it’s always in the back of my mind if she actually likes the way he kisses? Lol I certainly didn’t want to repeat it but she married him. As someone else said, there is no such thing as a bad kisser. It’s about compatibility. Perhaps OP, you should tell him you thought the same about him ! And ask how can “we” fix this ? Link to comment
j.man Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 There's no such as a bad kisser.I mean, I guess you could spin someone bricking a layup as doing a good job hitting the backboard, but bad kissing does indeed exist. No one wants someone else's saliva for clown lips. OP, I don't know what tone the guy used. I might agree to find a better teacher, though. Or ground your expectations of your relationship with this dude and keep using it as a learning opportunity. Up to you. If I were young and inexperienced and had someone willing to keep practicing with me, I'd probably just run with it until time came to move on. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 Why not just ask him to show you what a good kiss is like, then relax your lips and let him show you what he wants you to do? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted June 13, 2019 Share Posted June 13, 2019 Maybe he doesn't know how to kiss. Watch some romance movies there is usually a lot of kissing in them. Link to comment
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