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Thread: Made a mistake. Struggling to cope.

  1. #41
    Platinum Member
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    Hi Chloe, my gut tells me you will probably fall for his game, and go back. I hope I'm wrong, just my sense based on all you've written on this thread and others.

    But I'd like you to condider this.

    It's obvious the guy has issues, whether he's conflicted, a "commitment phobe" or a flat out manipulating d-bag, a person with such issues doesn't resolve such issues within one week!

    He was very cruel to you just one week ago. Didn't feel the "spark" didn't know what he wanted, needed a break to see if he missed you, then became beligerant after you gave him the space he requested, and took space for yourself.

    Now just one week later, he miraculously had this grand epiphany, acts like nothing happened and wants you back?

    Come on now Chkoe, does this make sense to you?

    How can you possibly trust that? It's been one week!

    Clearly, he still doesn't know what he wants and maybe blue was on to something -- when you're *there*, he's turned off, when you're *gone* he's turned on. At the end of the day, it's a crazy making mind f*.

    But perhaps you're just gonna have to play this out, get hurt again, perhaps a few times, before you decide you've had enough.

    I hope I am wrong, and if you do choose to go back, this does work out for you.

    Whatever happens, pls keep us posted, okay?

    I've become quite invested in your story, good luck!!
    Last edited by katrina1980; 06-11-2019 at 09:51 AM.

  2. #42
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    You need to let go. You are worth more than someone who only sees you for your body. BOYS do not care how you feel as they are selfish and want to get their fix. Cut off all communication and focus on yourself.

  3. #43
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    The classic actions of an unavailable person. If he finds you too available he runs away and insists it's not what he wants. He finds you out of reach and now he wants you back. My guess is if you were let him close, he'd back up to safely maintain the same amount of distance that he's required all along.
    The question is, now long are you going to allow him to manage this on his terms and decide this doesn't work for you?

  4. #44
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    Meeting up with him is a bad idea, OP.

    He knows which buttons to push. He knows you're not yet strong enough to tell him to go fly a kite. Meeting him in person is not going to bring you closure; it will almost surely do the opposite and reopen the can of worms you two keep dipping your fingers into.

    If you were less emotionally attached to him, and more time had passed, then a meet-up wouldn't be such a risky endeavor. But you're not there, yet. That is perfectly understandable given how fresh this all is; however, it's not the context in which to see and talk to him. You're very likely to wind right back where you started, and hurt all over again.

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  6. #45
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    They're back together guys.

    But she'll be back.

  7. #46
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    Thank you for the messages. I needed a few days to get my head straight. He done exactly what I thought, had me and is now playing games again. I have walked away for good now. I am distraught And can’t even believe I considered giving him a second chance. He decided to go on yet another guy’s vacation just yesterday, and thanks to Instagram found out a lot more than I wanted to. Mainly videos being posted by his friends of girls all over him in clubs. I feel sick to my stomach. It has honestly made me never trust another guy again. I am heartbroken but trying to repair myself. Every one of you was right, I guess I was vulnerable and thought hey everybody deserves second chances. My depression is at an all time low and I am trying to seek help for this again.

  8. #47
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    Hi everyone. Thanks for the continued responses, I have read each and every single one and given everything much thought. As an update, I nearly agreed to see him again. He then tells me he is going on a guy’s holiday, again, I then see through Instagram multiple videos and pictures with girls in clubs etc and him being all over them. I feel so sick. I am absolutely heart broken. I thought I would also share some back ground on myself and him too. I work as a model through an agency, and he is a premier league footballer. I have not disclosed my real name or names of course. I have sadly recieved a lot of ‘I told you so’ comments from friends and family, which is making me feel worse tbh. He has effected me so severely I have even been signed off work sick, and I am losing out on shoots and jobs because of this fool. I am in a terrible place right now. But this forum has helped me so much, in ways I never thought it could. I am so grateful for all the honest, raw and insightful replies. I am now trying to rebuild my self and life. I am finding it extremely hard.

  9. #48
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    Hi Katrina. Thank you again for your response. I have left a detailed thread update. I am absolutely never going back there, he has destroyed me for good this time.

    I almost agreed to see him, he then tells me he is going on holiday with his guy friends again. I then see through Instagram just today videos posted by his friends of girls all over him in the club. I’m a model, he is a footballer, what did I ever expect? I am so heartbroken as I cared for him so much. He has proven every bad reputation they have right. Honestly, it has put me off meeting anyone ever again. I invested so much time and love into him to have it all completely shattered. Anything he said about wanting to try again is just BS. There are sleazy girls throwing themselves at him, and he is obviously lapping this up but wanting to keep me around. I owe myself so much more. Right now I feel weak, but I am praying the days will get easier and I will get stronger.

  10. #49
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    He has done exactly that. Everything he said was a load of BS. He has broken my heart for the last time. I never ever want to go through this ever again. I am just no awaiting the day I wake up and don’t feel sick with anxiety, upset and heartbreak over him. I am torn up that he can do, say and behave this way. He has mentally and emotionally exhausted me.

  11. #50
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    Absolutely not, I have walked away for good. I had to take some time out to confirm this but his actions have only re confirmed this for me. He took advantage of me at my most vulnerable, fed me absolute BS. I then find on Instagram today videos posted of him flirting with multiple women while on holiday, even liking and commenting on their pictures posted. I feel so sick and heartbroken. Everybody was right. But I think this was the final shock to my system I needed to get the hell out and never, ever let him enter my life ever again.

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