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Thread: Is my ex looking to date other people already?

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    This doesn't mean she "moved on". Don't torture yourself.
    Well a small update - since she looked up the guy, but didnt add him, the guy added her the next day. So yeah. I guess she did move on.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by fahred
    Well a small update - since she looked up the guy, but didnt add him, the guy added her the next day. So yeah. I guess she did move on.
    Im sorry.

    EDITED: ok for some reason totally missed the giant nugget that you were accessing her private Facebook account. Its wrong, but it happens, especially with shared computers, I had access to everything Id my ex husbands after we separated, I looked once, and the sting was enough to not look again, I mean it hurt, to see the lies being told about me, conversations with his now girlfriend, ouch, ouch, ouch...worst 5 minutes of my life...why are you torturing yourself?

    What shes doing is what people do after breaking up, its nothing out of the ordinary but shes the woman who broke your heart and you have a front row seat to her post breakup actions, its very toxic.

    Please do yourself a favor and log off and delete any saved passwords you have.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by fahred
    Well a small update - since she looked up the guy, but didnt add him, the guy added her the next day. So yeah. I guess she did move on.
    There was a time I used to engage in unhealthy behaviors and though I am far from perfect, I have learned my lessons on self harm.

    What helped me was every time I was tempted to lurk, drive by, whatever, I'd ask myself out loud `will doing this make me feel better or worse?' Every-single-answer was `worse' It was a simple enough act to stop this and it helped get me to the other side of the the grief you are now experiencing.

    I can remember getting into my car once to drive and check on someone and just asking myself this question (will what I see make me feel better or worse?) was enough to stop me in my tracks and turn around and go home. Why on earth would I continue to hurt myself? It made no rational sense.

    I think we do these unhealthy behaviors in an attempt to stay attached. But the rub is, we are actively doing things that keep us attached long after the other person has moved on.

    I am sorry. Break ups bring out the worst in us sometimes. Take care of yourself.

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