Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 18 of 18

Thread: What is going on here?

  1. #11
    This someone was a friend of my family. He gets on quite well with some staff members and they have never mentioned a partner. I don't know for sure whether he does or doesn't have a partner, you're right.
    Look I came on here for some advice, not an ear bashing.

  2. #12
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    Florida Panhandle
    Posts
    645
    Gender
    Female
    You've GOTTEN advice. What did you want? Tea and sympathy? Why do you consider the comments that people have made an 'ear bashing'?

  3. #13
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,514
    Gender
    Female
    No one gave you an “ ear bashing” there was zero wrong with any reply there. If you don’t agree with the advice that is your prerogative but no one bashed or was mean to you .

  4. #14
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    49,916
    No ear bashing here. Ear bashing does not equal "I wanted to hear that he likes me but is shy/unsure but instead I heard that he is not interested in dating me."

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    4,386
    Gender
    Female
    He doesn't sound shy. But he's throwing you off-balance and that isn't good, imo. Some people like to be chased and keep people guessing. I can see how that can be fun and even intriguing in the beginning, but ultimately it's crazy-making and not good relationship-fodder.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Posts
    1,403
    “I am sick of asking for advice on this and getting gbh of the earhole over it and being made to be the bad guy“

    What do you mean by sick of asking advice? You only asked once on here?
    And received unbiased opinions that didn’t seem to agree with opinions you got in real life? But that’s normal because friends and family tend to be optimistic over realistic. Focusing on the what if’s rather than the facts.

    I assumed you came here for a realistic opinion.

    Certainly no one has made you out to be the “bad guy”
    There is no bad guy to the story.
    Just two people that briefly flirted and nothing came of it.

    Why is this causing you so much angst?

  8. #17
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Location
    Southwest
    Posts
    556
    Gender
    Female
    Dating a coworker can be a slippery slope, and while there may be an attraction and flirting, it doesn't necessarily mean the other person wants to take it to the next step. Your shifts sound rather opposite, which makes relationships hard, plus you sound like you do work closely enough together that dating, and especially fighting during a relationship or breaking up, can make the work relationship intolerable. Let's not forget other legalities that could potentially pop up and complaints from subordinates and coworkers if there is any perceived favoritism. I feel like you should just go about a professional relationship and focus less on whether this guy is potentially your next boyfriend. He didn't leap at the chance of meeting outside of work, and he's run a little hot/cold, and maybe dating a coworker is not a boundary he wishes to cross; maybe he's just really slow to take that leap...I don't know. At some point I think you're going to want to pursue other potential relationships, and if you want to date someone else, and you don't want to make your work relationship more awkward when you do, I suggest dialing back on flirting and just keep things friendly and professional.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    49,916
    Originally Posted by purplepaisley
    Dating a coworker can be a slippery slope, and while there may be an attraction and flirting, it doesn't necessarily mean the other person wants to take it to the next step. Your shifts sound rather opposite, which makes relationships hard, plus you sound like you do work closely enough together that dating, and especially fighting during a relationship or breaking up, can make the work relationship intolerable. Let's not forget other legalities that could potentially pop up and complaints from subordinates and coworkers if there is any perceived favoritism. I feel like you should just go about a professional relationship and focus less on whether this guy is potentially your next boyfriend. He didn't leap at the chance of meeting outside of work, and he's run a little hot/cold, and maybe dating a coworker is not a boundary he wishes to cross; maybe he's just really slow to take that leap...I don't know. At some point I think you're going to want to pursue other potential relationships, and if you want to date someone else, and you don't want to make your work relationship more awkward when you do, I suggest dialing back on flirting and just keep things friendly and professional.
    I met my husband at work but the crucial distinctions that helped so much were: we worked at a large company on different floors where we would very rarely see each other, we never worked together and we were in totally different departments with different supervisors. Ironically after we started dating there was a minor chance we would have been staffed on the same large project. He told his supervisor- who was a very thoughtful, kind person - and it never came to pass so it was a nonissue. About 6 months after we started dating I left (for reasons unrelated to our relationship) and a year later he left (unrelated). It was fine and a great way to meet a future husband!

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •