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Thread: Pregnant and cheated on

  1. #1

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    Pregnant and cheated on

    My partner and I have been together for 3 years and got pregnant last year. We have been going through rocky times that led to me losing trust and him drinking every night during my pregnancy. At month 8 one of those drinking nights turned into him going home with a random woman. The next day, which is the only positive action of this whole thing, he confessed to everything. Itís an incredibly difficult spot deciding to either stay forgive and work to provide our child with a healthy intact family or to act on the hurt and fear of never being able to trust and heal and try and go through it all alone.

  2. #2
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    Do you think you can forgive him?

  3. #3
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    I'd try and go it alone with his financial support since its his responsibility too. I see no wonderful and healthy relationship ahead with a man that drinks like I suspect he does.

    Do you have family that will support you through this?

  4. #4
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    Originally Posted by MunaVerwalt
    My partner and I have been together for 3 years and got pregnant last year. We have been going through rocky times that led to me losing trust and him drinking every night during my pregnancy. At month 8 one of those drinking nights turned into him going home with a random woman. The next day, which is the only positive action of this whole thing, he confessed to everything. Itís an incredibly difficult spot deciding to either stay forgive and work to provide our child with a healthy intact family or to act on the hurt and fear of never being able to trust and heal and try and go through it all alone.
    It's already unhealthy, OP.

    You might choose to remain intact but there is no guarantee it will be remotely healthy.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Clio's Avatar
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    It sounds like he is an alcoholic. He is also the kind of guy who is capable of cheating on his pregnant wife. Imo, the odds are sadly against you.

  7. #6
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    If you want a future with an alcoholic, liar and cheater, then stay put.

    I think that it would be best interest of you and the child, to go it alone. Your child should not be subjected to his behavior, it is abusive.

  8. #7
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    Please see a counselor for yourself. If you can, move in with family. See an attorney to establish full physical custody of the child for yourself and file for child support. he will not get help if you stay. That's a guarantee.

  9. #8
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    Very few people are able to go the long term following infidelity. Keep in mind that trust is the glue that holds a relationship together, therefore without that you basically have nothing.

    Either way, I'm sorry you're in this situation and hopefully you'll strive to make the right choices.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    You don't have and can't have a "healthy intact family" with an alcoholic womanizer. So do not "stay and hurt" or stay and forgive", those are horrible options for your child and your future. Leave immediately for the sake of yourself, your future and your child. Immediately apply for child support on behalf of your child and only allow supervised visitation.

    Never let an alcoholic around a child. Be a responsible mother and leave. You are more alone now than ever and will always be as long as you stay with this boozing creep. If you leave him, at least you and your child will have a chance at a normal life and happiness.
    Originally Posted by MunaVerwalt
    We have been going through rocky times that led to me losing trust and him drinking every night during my pregnancy. Itís an incredibly difficult spot deciding to either stay forgive and work to provide our child with a healthy intact family or to act on the hurt and fear of never being able to trust and heal and try and go through it all alone.

  11. #10
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    An alcoholic womanizer?
    Wow!
    The guy did cheat once yes. He admitted it straight away. Does that make him a womanizer? No , it makes him guilty of cheating.

    OP, did you guys drink regularly until you got pregnant?

    ďWe have been going through rocky times that led to me losing trust and him drinking every night during my pregnancyĒ

    Can you expand on what was rocky that led you to mistrust him?

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