Guy hates you?

At least 3 male coworkers whom I used to work with make me think they hate me. When we are in group of ppl, they said that i was not beautiful / couldn’t find any boyfriend / they said they would never date me / made my boss think that i made a mistake at work which i didn’t.

But when we are alone, they told me i was beautiful, asked me to go to movie / dinner, asked if i need any snack since i’ve helped their work.

What’s wrong with these people? They hate me ? I’m shy and quiet, sometimes i made arguments with them about work. Is this because i have a weak confidence and stupid ?

Bullies do target whom they think is weak prey. It's always good to build your self esteem, so read some articles and books on how to do that for your own good.

Don't allow people in your life who are toxic to you. Don't join that group of people anymore for activities. If there are people in that group who are great friends, tell them you'll get together with them individually, but will no longer do the group activities because of the way you're treated by the jerks.

You used to work with but don’t now?

Do you work in a male dominated profession?

No, i’m still working with one of them. Most of the workers are female in my office.

Even though you have a crush on him, keep it professional. Be cordial and polite at work. Don't be difficult, unfriendly, argumentative and do not flirt. Keep your dating life outside of the office.

I’m shy and quiet, sometimes i made arguments with them about work.

Do you think they like me ?

Replied in your identical thread about this: https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=559259&p=7124135&viewfull=1#post7124135

yes , i forgot about this. I hope it indicates interest, but it seems not to be..

Absolutely do not go out with anyone who treats you so poorly in public or in any context. That type of behavior is inexcusable, regardless of what they may tell you in private. Stay away from people so lowly.

I can't say for sure what their problem might be, but given that most of the workers there are female, I can imagine they're probably just a mix of confused, desperate and frustrated to be acting like this towards you. If you can, try to not mind them so much, as they're clearly not people worthy of attention. Focusing on growing at the workplace, make everyone appreciate you for your good work rather than for whatever petty remarks lowly coworkers might make. You're better than these people, be proud. Eventually, these things will stop, if you manage to face them with confidence, be it even simulated, and not give them the satisfaction of having visibly hurt you.

“But when we are alone, they told me i was beautiful, asked me to go to movie / dinner, asked if i need any snack since i’ve helped their work“

Your last thread simply suggested getting your coworker to get you a snack. Not anything else.

I find it hard to believe (sorry) that this guy or any other guy said in a group setting that you are not beautiful and no one would date you. (Without anyone in the group saying something if the comments were rude)

I think you are concocting stories in your head?

How is your social life outside of work??

It's a play to get you in the sack and they don't want anyone you work with to know what they are doing.

Why are you interested in someone that speaks to you the way they do?!?! I seem to remember another thread (not yours) where the concept of “negging” was brought up... a ploy that f$&@ boys use to break down walls of their intended targets to make them easier to get into bed. My guess is that’s exactly what they are doing to you right now... clearly they don’t respect you or think you are worth dating or they wouldn’t speak to you that way.

Pick your self esteem up off the floor OP and walk away from these guys.

Do you think they like me ?

People do not insult and embarrass, if they like and respect you. Stay away.

How old are you? Have you dated anyone?

A young woman I used to know was referred in our friend group as "Moped". What that meant was secretly the guys wanted to "take a ride" (i.e., have sex with her), but they were too embarrassed to admit it in public because she was overweight.

Don't allow ANYONE to treat you like the moped. If they can't be decent to you in public they don't get to play with you in private.

A young woman I used to know was referred in our friend group as "Moped". What that meant was secretly the guys wanted to "take a ride" (i.e., have sex with her), but they were too embarrassed to admit it in public because she was overweight.

 

Don't allow ANYONE to treat you like the moped. If they can't be decent to you in public they don't get to play with you in private.

Completely agree with this although unsure if that’s the case with the OP.

Her related events in this post differ to her previous post. So I’m unsure what’s actually going on because it’s hard to believe that these guys said these things in a group setting that is predominantly female. And that not one person stood up.