She lost interest after I failed to make a move

I was dating this girl for 4 months. We were seeing each other like once every week or 2 weeks since we are both competetive athletes and both studying, so there wasn't much time. I was at her place 3 fckin times and I just didn't know what to do. I had sex before only twice and always drunk plus it was quite some time ago, so this time it felt like real first time for me, with someone I actually care about. We were always just making out wildly, but I didn't proceed any further. Obviously because of the little free time we have, she lost interest. I feel like crap. I never had a relationship before, because all I always did was school, training and fighting. Yeah, I am a 21 years old competetive fighter who failed to make a move. I never felt so fckin ashamed. I fell for her and I lost her because of this. I must be the ONLY PERSON in the world who failed to make a move at girl's place 3 fckin times. My manlyhood got a hard knockdown and I feel like drowning in regrets. What a great picture of a fighter. I am confident at everything I do except sex, because of the lack of experience. This failure sent me to this dark place in my head I didn't even know exists, especially when she just told me few dys ago (3 months from our last meetup) that she loved me, but this and the time apart we then had made her interest go away. How the hell can I get past this?

Don't beat yourself up over this. Not every woman expects sex at 4 months or beyond. Some women focus on getting to know you first for a long time before sex. You get past this by knowing you did not fail. If sex was her anticipation at 4 months, this wasn't your fault. There was lack of communication from both of you. Don't feel ashamed. Sex isn't the end all. In the future, establish friendship first, really get to know a woman, communicate and make sure both of you are on the same page regarding sex or any decision. Some couples wait years to have sex or until after marriage. Everyone is different. Find a woman who focuses on character first and foremost because that is what is most enduring.

Did she ask you to make a move? If not, that not the reason she lost interest. It sounds like there is too much going on in her life. You don't see each other enough and live too far apart. It's possible she started seeing someone local or more available. First look at the real reasons things fell apart. And it's not because you didn't force yourself on her.

this time it felt like real first time for me, with someone I actually care about. We were always just making out wildly, but I didn't proceed any further. she just told me few dys ago (3 months from our last meetup) that she loved me, but this and the time apart we then had made her interest go away.