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Thread: Social media and dating

  1. #121
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Said it I believe in your last thread, but people baffled at HoW oP CoUlD pOsSiBlY sTaY wItH hIm??? are banking on her characterization of him being the entire story. I mean lady was just here pissed off that he wasn't dramatically complicating their relationship further taking her under his wing at his business to put in all the footwork of changing industries for her. Comes in here fairly routinely about mundane issues like this which people understandably want to attribute to a deeper meaning, but honestly, I don't think there's anything deeper there. It's just petty drama. It's likely just what she does. Dude (at least by an account I can't even put much faith in at this point) seems to be banking on his resume doing all the speaking for him in this relationship. She does her thing. He just glosses his eyes over. It's a tired but unfortunately true cliche. They deserve each other.

    At this point, do your thing or don't. You're not some victim of a cycle. Whether you're the torque or friction, take your pick, but the wheel's rolling just as much for your participation.

  2. #122
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by j.man
    Said it I believe in your last thread, but people baffled at HoW oP CoUlD pOsSiBlY sTaY wItH hIm??? are banking on her characterization of him being the entire story. I mean lady was just here pissed off that he wasn't dramatically complicating their relationship further taking her under his wing at his business to put in all the footwork of changing industries for her. Comes in here fairly routinely about mundane issues like this which people understandably want to attribute to a deeper meaning, but honestly, I don't think there's anything deeper there. It's just petty drama. It's likely just what she does. Dude (at least by an account I can't even put much faith in at this point) seems to be banking on his resume doing all the speaking for him in this relationship. She does her thing. He just glosses his eyes over. It's a tired but unfortunately true cliche. They deserve each other.

    At this point, do your thing or don't. You're not some victim of a cycle. Whether you're the torque or friction, take your pick, but the wheel's rolling just as much for your participation.
    And boom goes the dynamite.

  3. #123
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    Originally Posted by mandeelove
    If you are 100 percent exclusive and committed to a person and you did some fun things together such as(vacation, scenic outting etc) would you add a picture to your social media of you together? How much of a red flag is it,if one person in the relationship never posts your picture?
    Social media use is just another thing to consider when it comes to compatibility. It's not a red flag if someone is private with their social media. It is a red flag only as it speaks to a potential incompatibility. If you like to share and your partner doesn't, you have to decide how important that is.

  4. #124
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mandeelove
    I agree with seeing me as a doormat. I also think its too late to gain respect back and now Ive seen the worst sides of him. Its too late overall. Thats why he changes for 2 weeks and then returns to the same behaviors because 2 weeks is usually how long it takes me to forgive him. If I had walked away right away maybe he would of changed, treated me better . Then again idk. I think this is his personality. Wont change for anyone type attitude.
    I read the entire thread but had to come back to this^^

    Your reason for not changing how you interact with him is because it won't change him? It's too late, as you say?

    You don't change for him. *And - you don't change to create change in him.

    The change is for you and only you.

    You change how you conduct your life and your expectations on how others, especially him, treat you.

    People either get out of your way or they get in line. Be prepared to see a different cast of characters in your life once you begin to change and with that you will require these people have better qualities.
    *qualities that can't be bought or put on a spread sheet.

    You start by believing you deserve better than scraps he's feeding you. . and the ones you are willing to accept.

    Change is for you.
    To heck with him.

    the carrot he dangles, the one where you need to make more money is just a goal post. I'll be my paycheck this goal post will move the moment your paycheck matches his.

    There is nothing loving about this man or the way he treats you.
    But the biggest question is why don't you believe you deserve better?

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