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Thread: Any Advice for loss of a mother?

  1. #11
    Member PerkyGreek's Avatar
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    If you will seek counseling, consider looking for one with experience in thanatology, that is, coping with death and grieving. The website of ADEC might have has a list of affiliated counselors. Another thing is that the book “Never the Same” by Donna Schuurman might also help you in some way. Finally, many people also find relief after talking to a pastor, something you might want to try.

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by reinventmyself
    I lost my mom 6 months ago and it's only been in the last month that I stopped bursting out in tears spontaneously almost every day.

    I signed up for a grief support group and never went. If I could take that time back, I would have gone.

    When you are still grieving, your support has moved on. I get it, grief makes people very uncomfortable and they don't know what to say. The obligatory `sorry for your loss' is to be expected, but when those waves crash over you, your best friend gets freaked out when you are crying in your car - 4 months later.

    She urgently asked me `what happened and what triggered it!?' I told her that just because I wasn't talking about and nothing has to trigger it, it doesn't mean I am not thinking about it ~all- the- time. I just miss her terribly.

    Or my sweet boyfriend is afraid to bring her up `because it makes you sad'
    I shared with him `But I AM SAD!' I am just not showing it because people (like you)get uncomfortable and can't fix it.

    You just need to someone to talk to long past the point that everyone thinks it should be it's sell date. . . and I think a support group is great option. There are plenty of them.

    I am sorry for the loss of your Mom (hugs) It's a loss you can't begin explain.
    Thank you!

  3. #13

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    Originally Posted by Chuckyd123
    My Mom passed away recently. Any tips on coping?
    So sad to hear your distressing news.
    No magic fix hun, but allow yourself the grieving space that u need..,
    That’s enough right now

  4. #14
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    Originally Posted by Cherylyn
    I'm terribly sorry for your tremendous loss, Chuckyd123. Give yourself a lot of time for your very wounded heart. I'm very sorry for the void you must feel.

    Allow yourself to grieve alone but don't be alone too much. Surround yourself with caring, compassionate people whether family, relatives, in-laws and / or friends. Don't trudge along in your grief all by yourself.

    If support groups are all there is, you can go that route but in person support is best of all.
    Thanks Chrerylyn

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by rachel69
    So sad to hear your distressing news.
    No magic fix hun, but allow yourself the grieving space that u need..,
    That’s enough right now
    Thanks Rachel69

  7. #16
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    Originally Posted by PerkyGreek
    If you will seek counseling, consider looking for one with experience in thanatology, that is, coping with death and grieving. The website of ADEC might have has a list of affiliated counselors. Another thing is that the book “Never the Same” by Donna Schuurman might also help you in some way. Finally, many people also find relief after talking to a pastor, something you might want to try.
    Thanks PerkyGreek

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    I hope you are doing ok and get the support you need. My husband lost his mother about 5 years ago. I loved her very much and I miss her. He loved her so so much and was so very close to her. It's hard. I did my best and do my best to be supportive. Here's one suggestion -if hearing anecdotes about your mother would comfort you please let people know that. I didn't always know when it was ok or whether it could make it worse. In fact last night I mentioned her to my husband as in "your mother would have loved this [something our son did that was really funny!]"

    All the best to you. I'm very sorry for your loss.
    Thanks Batya33

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