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Thread: An ex

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by Confused1844
    We met in Feb 18 and I moved in March 18, a short time I know but I honestly love her and I don't want to end it but it's driving me mad even though she assures me she would never do anything but having these emotional chats with him isn't doing our relationship any good
    So you moved how far after only chatting 4 weeks?
    Was she actually ok with this??!
    Because no sane person would be!?
    Had you even met her before you moved?

    Perhaps she feels a sense of obligation to make it work with you because you moved but really ??
    You split up in October because of the ďdistance thingĒ but thereís was no distance?
    And she split up with an ex that she dated for a mere 6 months?
    Did she accept his proposal?

    Your timelines donít add up.
    Are you trolling?????

  2. #12
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    We met in Feb 18 and I moved in March 18, a short time I know but I honestly love her and I don't want to end it but it's driving me mad even though she assures me she would never do anything but having these emotional chats with him isn't doing our relationship any good
    Am I being taken for a mug or shall I just stay silent?
    She did say she would cut ties with him if it meant losing me but she said that reminds her of her controlling abusive ex husband and I don't want to be that guy

  3. #13
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    Sorry March 19, I'm no troll, it was a typo

  4. #14
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    The men in her life aren't the problem. She is. Many of us have already answered your question in depth.

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by Confused1844
    Hi, I am looking for some advice in my current relationship.
    I fell in love with a girl I met just over a year ago online.
    We grew close, met up and clicked.
    It was a distance relationship and we struggled for a while,
    To cut a long story short I decided to quit my job, move to be close to her and give it a go.
    I have a place in the same village as her and I stay at hers some nights and vice versa
    Last month when I stayed at hers one night, watching TV in bed I was dozing off next to her and I noticed her keep looking at her phone and messaging, she thought I was asleep.
    I asked her who she was talking too and she went quiet and turned around and ignored my question
    I did eventually get her to admit it was her ex,
    I asked her if she thought it was right to do that with me there?
    She says nothing is going on and to trust her, i think it's out of order.
    I would love some feedback so I can get my head around this and to get another external perspective
    How is this part not a big red flag? Especially given you already knew she kept in touch with him. What did she feel she needed to hide?

  7. #16
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    Originally Posted by Confused1844
    Sorry March 19, I'm no troll, it was a typo
    Ok so you only know her about 6 weeks?
    And already issues re trust cropping up?
    What does YOUR gut tell you?

  8. #17
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    No, I meant we met Feb 18 and I moved March 19
    I think she still had an emotional connection that she won't let go of, I really do think she loves me but I sometimes feel she doesn't want to let him go incase we don't work out, he's her safety net but she says she will never get back together with him.
    I just don't want to throw away our relationship, I was trying get a feeling of how other people feel about texting ex's

  9. #18
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    Originally Posted by Confused1844
    No, I meant we met Feb 18 and I moved March 19
    I think she still had an emotional connection that she won't let go of, I really do think she loves me but I sometimes feel she doesn't want to let him go incase we don't work out, he's her safety net but she says she will never get back together with him.
    I just don't want to throw away our relationship, I was trying get a feeling of how other people feel about texting ex's
    The timelines are still not clear!
    When did you first physically meet?
    How often did you meet after that before moving?
    Whose idea was it?
    If she loves you she doesnít need a safety net.
    Love is a risk and we jump in with no guarantee that the risk will have good return.
    A safety net should be friends and family. Not an ex.

    No, she should not be in touch with an insignificant ex.
    Only an ex if she had a child with and for that purpose only.
    His proposal was clearly a joke ! He didnít even know her. Mind you , you donít know her that well either.

  10. #19
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    We first physically met in Feb 18, we met up every month, she came to mine, I went to hers, we met half way and stayed together, we got closer
    When we are together we have an amazing time, she asked if I would consider moving as she is a mature student at uni and has kids, we discussed it for months and decided to go for it
    It seems to be this issue with this ex keeps rearing it's head and we argue.

  11. #20
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    We first physically met in Feb 18, we met up every month, she came to mine, I went to hers, we met half way and stayed together, we got closer
    When we are together we have an amazing time, she asked if I would consider moving as she is a mature student at uni and has kids, we discussed it for months and decided to go for it
    It seems to be this issue with this ex keeps rearing it's head and we argue.

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