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Thread: Attracting someone’s attention in a social setting

  1. #1
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    Attracting someone’s attention in a social setting

    So, imagine a group of 6 people sat round a table (just to make things easy). The 2 groups of 2 people on both sides of me are in conversation with each other.

    There’s me sat there on my own, and opposite, there’s someone else sat not talking to anyone either. It’s not a particularly big or small table either (just normal for a bar etc). It also wouldn’t be easy for me to get up and move (as happens at meal socials). There’s also some noise (music in the background).

    What’s the best way for me to attract someone’s attention to start a conversation with that other person sat opposite me?

    p.s. I thought this might be the best place to post, as although it’s not specifically about dating, this could help in both singles and general socialising situations.

  2. #2
    Gold Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Just lean in and say "sooooooo...what's your sign? wink"

  3. #3
    Gold Member LikeWater's Avatar
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    Get their attention first. It shouldn't be hard if you're across from each other both being left out (or uninterested) in the conversational flow. Make eye contact, smile, and maybe gesture for them to come over to you. Then you could say you've been wanting to talk to them but it's too noisy or we're too far apart or whatever the case, and see if they'd like to move to a spot where you can actually hear each other. You mentioned a bar so maybe go sit at the bar counter together.

    Shouldn't be anything rude or awkward about it and the others can continue as they were, talking to each other like they have been. Nobody wants to feel out of the conversation loop and nobody wants to have to yell across a table to start up a conversation, so there's no shame in putting yourself in a better position to be social.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Are there any other issues in this scenario? Any other complications? Social anxiety or ?

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    You could blow the paper off of your straw at them.

  7. #6
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Greet them (say "Hi"), and then ask them a question to get the conversation started. If it's a woman, all you have to do is get her talking - women typically talk twice as much as men.

  8. #7
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    I’ve got an updated version of my question based on the replies and some further thought:

    What type of signal would work best to attract someone’s attention with the intention of starting a conversation with them? If it’s someone I know, I could use their name, but this would be for someone I’ve never talked to before.

    They also might not be looking in my direction. Obviously, they’ll be close enough to actually have a conversation with them! I’d prefer something subtle so I’m not jumping around like a nutter!

    I know you can move round to talk to someone, but you’ve got to start the conversation first.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Replied in your identical thread about pickup lines in supermarkets: [Register to see the link]


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