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Thread: I really just need advice from others :(

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by BillieBlues
    There is no way we could have made it a long distance relationship because he is in the military which means we would have no contact whilst he is away. We wouldnt be able to call or text because there is barely any WiFi out there and hed be busy with what hes doing.

    Obviously the end was inevitable. I just wish we would have just left it up until he deployed
    Well still he could have called you at least sometimes, right? When there's a will, there's a way. YOU really like him so you are still hoping to see him again, so it is possible to still want to see someone in future even if you won't see them for three months. He could have waited to see you again when he comes back. I think the point is he doesn't WANT to keep seeing you in future. The military thing may just be an excuse.

  2. #12
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    The thing Im missing most is being able to spend time with him and being able to talk to him. I want to just take advantage of whatever time we had left together. I know it would still hurt having to say goodbye to him but at least id have made the most out of it.

  3. #13
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    Originally Posted by Tinydance
    Well still he could have called you at least sometimes, right? When there's a will, there's a way. YOU really like him so you are still hoping to see him again, so it is possible to still want to see someone in future even if you won't see them for three months. He could have waited to see you again when he comes back. I think the point is he doesn't WANT to keep seeing you in future. The military thing may just be an excuse.
    Ive just realised I made a mistake its not 3 months its 4 months 😣
    It wouldnt work that way. Of course in an ideal world wed be able to wait for each other and just continue when he got back but realistically 4 months is a long time to go without seeing someone or talking to them. Hes been hurt in the past whilst hes been away and its understandable that he doesnt want to risk it happening again. Obviously Id want him to just take a chance but I at the same time cant make any promises that id still feel the same way after all that time had passed.

    I know ending it was the sensible thing to do. I just wish we didnt have to. I dont know if Im making any sense?

  4. #14
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    Originally Posted by BillieBlues
    The thing Im missing most is being able to spend time with him and being able to talk to him. I want to just take advantage of whatever time we had left together. I know it would still hurt having to say goodbye to him but at least id have made the most out of it.
    No, you likely would have had an even more painful goodbye as you'd naturally have become more attached by then.

    He knows he can't give you the relationship you want. Commitment isn't his priority right now, whether by circumstance or by choice. In the end, why he chose to pull the plug now isn't the most important issue. It's the very fact that he feels it's better to be on his own than in a relationship.

    It's not pleasant, but there's really nothing you can do.

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  6. #15
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    Update!:

    He reached out recently and confirmed what I was thinking. Hed gotten a bit overwhelmed and needed some space, which I let him have.

    He told me how he felt and now were back together :)

  7. 05-23-2019, 11:17 AM

  8. #16
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    Originally Posted by BillieBlues
    He reached out recently and confirmed what I was thinking. Hed gotten a bit overwhelmed and needed some space, which I let him have.

    He told me how he felt and now were back together :)
    Do be cautious moving forward, OP. I don't mean to rain on your parade, but people who flip-flop that quickly tend not to be the most reliable partners in the long-run.

  9. #17
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    Thank you for your warning Misscanuck I definitely feel like that is something I should be wary of but given the circumstances I think anyone in that position would have a moment of doubt.

    If it does happen again however I know I would end it quickly as it would be clear that this is just part of his behaviour

  10. #18
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    Originally Posted by BillieBlues
    Thank you for your warning Misscanuck I definitely feel like that is something I should be wary of but given the circumstances I think anyone in that position would have a moment of doubt.

    If it does happen again however I know I would end it quickly as it would be clear that this is just part of his behaviour
    I suppose what would also concern me is that you already mentioned this will end when he deploys anyway. What's the plan of action now?

  11. #19
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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    I suppose what would also concern me is that you already mentioned this will end when he deploys anyway. What's the plan of action now?
    Thats no longer the case anymore :) were going to try and make it work when he comes back. He wants to make it official then too XD

  12. 05-25-2019, 05:13 PM

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