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Thread: I think she is interested in me but her ex is a good guy what is right to do?

  1. #1

    I think she is interested in me but her ex is a good guy what is right to do?

    So I went to a uni party a few weeks ago and there was a girl who kept hovering around me for a good 20mins. Then when I was heading over to a mate I accidentally bumped into her and after the apologies we started talking.
    My mates were saying she's into me but I take their advice with women with a table spoon of salt😂.

    We chat, I make her laugh a fair bit and spend a few hours together hovering between my friends and her friends.
    Then a guy came over and for some reason my gut told me he was her BF. Me and him ended up chatting for a while and he seems like a cool guy then he heads of and I figured he must just be a friend as there was no interaction with them.
    We hangout for another hour or so until I head home.

    A couple of days later one of her friends who I have known for a while, though we don't hangout outside of working together, invites me to an event and she is there so again we hangout.
    A few hours later the guy turns up and starts hugging her very obviously I take the hint and figured she just wants to be friends especially with her personality, she is the ditsy (not stupid) bubbly type that seems she would want to talk to most people.
    I make sure other interactions are more broad with other people (like if I show her a photo I show other people too) as I don't want to be "that guy".
    Before I leave she ask if she can add me on facebook so I add her.
    Next morning I check her profile and sure enough it shows she is in a relationship with the other guy and his profile says he's with her so I figured I was over thinking things. I also add her BF on facebook to try and not make it seem weird.

    About 5 days later I send her a message, a photo of some plants I bought, and literally within a minute she's replying and chatting.
    A few days later I see her BF changed his profile picture to one without her and I check their profiles which now say they both are single.
    Last night I went out with some mates and I bump into the guy at the pub. I chat to him for a bit and I invite him to spend the evening with us which he does and we have a good time. I ended up taking him back to my place as none of use know where he lives and he was too drunk to be able to safely get home.
    This morning after recovering he hanged out with me for a bit, we played UFC and watched some netflix, and when chatting he mentioned how in 2 months he is going to be moving across the country.

    Me and the girl are still chatting and she has been asking to come over to look at my animals and has said if I need someone to hold stuff when I build some enclosures to let her know first. To me it seems she is interested in me but I'm not sure on what would be right to do. He seems like a cool guy and I've only met this girl a few times (from their relationship status they had been together for a couple of years) so I don't want to be the reason why they don't get back together.
    I also don't want to be a rebound but also I don't want to unintentionally take advantage and would rather be sure she is emotionally stable from the break up first, like with flings I make sure she just wants sex because she is horny and there is nothing else going on... its happened before were a girl has came back to mine but something doesn't feel right and after prying we end up spending the night chatting and she unloads whatever emotional baggage she has and nothing more happens😂😅... And this girl seems really nice, someone I would consider a relationship with, so I want to make sure its done the right way. But at the same time I don't want to leave it too long and for her to assume I just want to be friends, thats happened a few times already.
    They haven't deleted their photos together or unfriended each other and it looks from the outside to be a mutual thing (I assume due to him moving).
    Was he checking me out to see what he thought of me do you think?
    Or am I just making things more complicated then needed?

    Thanks all :P

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Cloud Nine
    Wait until he moves across country to make your move on her. Just keep it friendly and keep on her your radar for now.
    Last edited by Wiseman2; 05-13-2019 at 06:59 AM.

  3. #3
    Bronze Member Afireblue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Vancouver, BC
    If I were you I would directly ask this guy you are now hanging out with if he would be okay with you asking her out if she were interested, and that at this point you don't know if she is.

    I would do that if I considered him a friend. If you are not at a "friend" level with him yet, then you can be honest with her and ask where she is at, if she is into you, but because she just went through a break up, you can suggest to take things very slowly.

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