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Thread: Was I rude

  1. #1
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    Was I rude

    A short question. I met someone one week ago at an event and at the end he asked me if we could share contacts. I got surprized because I wasnt flirty, nor did I gave him any sign of attraction, so I accepted because its nice to know more people, but also clarified it for us in a stupid way: "oh sure, so we can talk about the event"😂 Not sure why I needed to clarify that, instead of just accepting. The event is professional btw, and as a context we live in California.
    So, when he started telling me his nr. I said it was better that he had my number instead. So he wrote my nr. and that's all.
    I mean in general I prefer to leave the ball in the other court, so leave nr instead of save theirs, but was I rude in this context?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Why not connect on LinkedIn if it's professional and you have no interested in dating? It doesn't matter who takes whose number. Do you think he was asking you out? Do you want to go out with him?
    Originally Posted by score123
    A I met someone one week ago at an event and at the end he asked me if we could share contacts.

    The event is professional btw, and as a context we live in California.

  3. #3
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    Work events lead to work connections all the time.
    What’s the question???!

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    Gold Member smackie9's Avatar
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    This guy sounds like he some has confidence...he doesn't need confirmation or signals to approach a lady. I don't think it's rude, I think it was more of a bold move on your part to insist you just give your number instead which IMO a guy would see has a green light. We shall see what happen huh.

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  6. #5
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    I don't think you were rude at all. A little awkward maybe, but not rude

  7. #6
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    Originally Posted by Billie28
    Work events lead to work connections all the time.
    What’s the question???!
    Well it written

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    I don't think you were rude at all. Technically this guy shouldn't be expecting anything flirty out of this because it was a professional event not a party or night club.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    He's basically a stranger so I wonder why are you worried if you were rude, particularly because you prefer to put the "ball in his court?"

    You have a personal boundary and you maintained it with him. End of. If he thought you were "rude" then he's a flake so you're better off not hearing from him anyway.

    Are you attracted to him? Do you want him to ring you up for a date or did you just want to keep it professional?

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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    He's basically a stranger so I wonder why are you worried if you were rude, particularly because you prefer to put the "ball in his court?"

    You have a personal boundary and you maintained it with him. End of. If he thought you were "rude" then he's a flake so you're better off not hearing from him anyway.

    Are you attracted to him? Do you want him to ring you up for a date or did you just want to keep it professional?
    On first place I dont care, I cannot say I found him attractive, but you never know from a meetup. By professional I mean a meetup where you learn about something related to your field.
    I couldnt say no to a possibility to meet smb new though.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by score123
    On first place I dont care,
    Then why start a thread about it?

    I cannot say I found him attractive, but you never know from a meetup.
    So if you are interested in a possible date, then you were right to stick to your "I prefer to leave the ball in his court."

    By professional I mean a meetup where you learn about something related to your field.
    I couldnt say no to a possibility to meet smb new though.
    Which would indicate that you were networking in which case, why "leave the ball in his court?"

    Anyway, IMO you weren't rude unless all you want to do is network in which case, you should have just taken his contact info as well. You have to be a professional contact if you want to have a professional contact. I think you giving him your number and expecting him to call you would give him the impression that you were interested in a romantic date.

    Lets see if he calls/texts you and asks you out or just lets it fade. Let us know.

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