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Thread: Liking Co-worker

  1. #11

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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    I agree with the above.

    Also, OP, you need to stop feeding your crush by doing drive-bys and interacting with him about topics unrelated to work. Going to see where he leaves and seeing how he parks and checking out his social media is only going to make it harder for you to squash your interest. So, stop doing all of that.

    Remember too that you are seeing this guy through rose-coloured glasses. He might be a great man, or he might be an absolute jerk behind closed doors. The point is that you are putting him on a pedestal based on very little real-life information, and also based on the fact that you are unhappy at home. This man surely has his flaws, as we all do, so you need to not get carried away in idealizing him too much.
    Yes i believe he has flaws, too as human being. I did those stuffs behind his back because i know i dont have any hope of having him, but my heart just like him even without knowing his whole personality. I just thankful for his presence because since i saw him i wanna rinse my mouth again with Listerine, i pay attention to what i wear again, etc. Before i met him, i was already like dead person. Dont care about myself.

  2. #12

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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    It's impossible to say. You two barely know each other so you have no idea how compatible you would be hypothetically be.

    And really, it doesn't matter. Unless and until you are no longer with your husband, the prospect of meeting someone new is irrelevant. If you don't want to be married anymore , address that first. Don't leave your marriage in hopes of something happening with another person, though. That frequently leads to serious disappointment when the new crush isn't what the married person imagined they were. Leave your marriage because you have exhausted all other efforts to make it right and you no longer want to spend a lifetime with your husband.
    I agree with you. That is what i think as well, so that my question above is how to quit my feeling for him. Besides apart from what kind of personality he has, i think he deserves better than me.

  3. #13

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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    It sounds like you have a crush on someone . The bigger problem is how unhappy your marriage is.
    I think i do have a crush on him. It is just i dont have possibility to be with him. I just will become his secret admirer and wishing all the best will happen to him.

  4. #14

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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    You can file for divorce in this country.
    I dont have money to pay lawyer, i dont have anybody to help. Once i contacted free law aid people for the victim of abused wife, i signed the paper of would getting help from them, then no news anymore from them.
    I dont have a place to go as well. Once i just slept in the car with the kids when we had big fight.

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by UsiFeb
    I dont have money to pay lawyer, i dont have anybody to help. Once i contacted free law aid people for the victim of abused wife, i signed the paper of would getting help from them, then no news anymore from them.
    I dont have a place to go as well. Once i just slept in the car with the kids when we had big fight.
    Is your husband abusing you?

  7. #16
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Go to the department of social services and ask for a representative who speaks your language and can help you.
    Originally Posted by UsiFeb
    I dont have money to pay lawyer, i dont have anybody to help. Once i contacted free law aid people for the victim of abused wife, i signed the paper of would getting help from them, then no news anymore from them.
    I dont have a place to go as well. Once i just slept in the car with the kids when we had big fight.

  8. #17

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    Originally Posted by Billie28
    Is your husband abusing you?
    He cheated on me one time; telling that girl all kind of bad thing about me, we fight a lot; one time he pushed me and i got bruise on my chest (police got involved), he using money without discussing it with me, buy house and car without discussing it with me, putting one of his adult kid in our place without my approval, etc. I can call that abuse i think. What do you think?

  9. #18

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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Go to the department of social services and ask for a representative who speaks your language and can help you.
    I should right? I just have a lot of consideration since he is the father of the kids and he is the main one who make money to feed them. That is my biggest concern that make me keep reconsidering about getting extended action about him.

    One time the police who saw my bruise from his push told me that all i have to do just ask her to arrest him. But i dont do it bcz of the kids.

  10. #19
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    Working at a convenience store part time is not going to give you the independence you eventually need to leave an abusive situation. Ask your husband to finance you getting an education that will lead to a good paying career, such as being a technician in the medical field: x-ray, physician's assistant, dental technician. If he refuses, see if you can get a college loan. You need to set this goal and work toward it. You only have one life on this planet. There are hurdles but not impossibilities in life. Stop with the excuses.

    If he is physically abusive and is arrested, you could say you fear for your life. Staying in a shelter with your kids is better than you being abused and your children being exposed to that. I've heard of social services helping women out in this instance with getting them low income housing and help with finding work. Good luck.

  11. #20

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    Originally Posted by Andrina
    Working at a convenience store part time is not going to give you the independence you eventually need to leave an abusive situation. Ask your husband to finance you getting an education that will lead to a good paying career, such as being a technician in the medical field: x-ray, physician's assistant, dental technician. If he refuses, see if you can get a college loan. You need to set this goal and work toward it. You only have one life on this planet. There are hurdles but not impossibilities in life. Stop with the excuses.

    If he is physically abusive and is arrested, you could say you fear for your life. Staying in a shelter with your kids is better than you being abused and your children being exposed to that. I've heard of social services helping women out in this instance with getting them low income housing and help with finding work. Good luck.
    Once i tried study online about computer but we have little kid (2 yrs) and it is hard to get focus on study when you need to babysit as well. He doesnt really help eventhough he saying i need to go to school again but once i tried, he barely wanna watch the kid or doing the chores such as cooking, cleaning, etc.

    Thank you for your time.

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