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Thread: First relationship ended

  1. #11
    Platinum Member
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    Originally Posted by SteS
    Now a week has passed since she left, and she's been back in touch saying doesn't want to get back together, but still wants me in her life!?! Is that a polite way if saying friend with benefits, or keeping me as a backup??
    It could be one or the other. Or both. Or neither.

    She likely feels awful for hurting you so she's extending an olive branch as a means of soothing her guilt. Given that you said this is your first relationship, and in turn your first real break-up, you likely don't realize that this gesture from her is very common from a dumper in a non-mutual break-up. It doesn't usually mean what the dumpee hopes it does.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Unfortunately this is the classic dilemma. She is thinking friendzone and you are thinking no strings sex. She means friendzone, no benefits. Basically you have been demoted to a male-girlfriend. Stay no contact and try to move forward. Do not try for fwb, just find someone else.
    Originally Posted by SteS
    she's been back in touch saying doesn't want to get back together, but still wants me in her life!?! Is that a polite way if saying friend with benefits.

  3. #13
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    May 2019
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    Yeah was thinking she wants to be just friends, told her I can't be just friends and in not interested in being a friend with benefits. So thanks for the advice, no contact it is, and eventually find someone else, but I'm going to concentrate on myself first

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