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Thread: Weirded out by GF serial liking her Stepsister's Boyfriends FB Posts

  1. #11
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    If you never interact on someoneís FB page , their posts rarely pop up on your newsfeed.
    If you interest a few times on someoneís FB page, their posts are bumped up to the top on your newsfeed.
    FB has some inbuilt way of seeing patterns and responds accordingly.

    I think you need to own up to your snooping and suffer the consequence of that.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Why is she interacting with her stepsister's bf's crap online so much anyway? Most people don't think much of it and use it like a window to voyeur (nothing else better to do probably). I'm more of the mind that everything counts - even stupid things a person does on their free time. If that's the stuff she does to occupy herself, then so be it. She has a right to like whatever she wants to like. It's best for you to really wake up and smell the flowers. This isn't the type of woman for you and you're entitled to that yourself. Neither of you are bad people and she certainly doesn't have to change anything about herself for you and vice versa. Please be more mature about this together and stop playing those blame games. This also means stop being around people who are so off key and whose behaviours are so off-putting to you.

  3. #13
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    I have nothing to add except this is precisely why my bf and I have deactivated our FBs.

    You wasting time and energy snooping your gf's FB, her step sister's FB, her step sister's bf's FB?

    Your gf wasting time and energy searching and liking her step sister's bf's FB posts?

    You become suspicious, you confront her, she gets defensive, accuses you of being insecure, a baby and breaks up w you!

    Good lordy, when will this insanity stop?

    Not just you OP, it's everywhere!

    It's all kinda nuts don't ya think?

    Sorry, just my own personal feeling/rant about FB, best of luck moving forward.
    Last edited by katrina1980; 05-04-2019 at 09:17 PM.

  4. #14
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    She's never been someone with strong morals or an actual good character so your trust issues stem from that. It won't ever change. No trust no relationship.

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  6. #15
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    Lots of good info in here, thanks for telling it straight everyone. I'm starting to feel really silly and immature. This is petty stuff and I should have more important things to do.

    She left Friday to her friends in another town and we haven't really spoken at all except her saying she was looking for rooms to move into in our city. We currently live together in a two room townhome by rental. So sadly, doesn't seem like there's anything I can propose to figure out a way forward and compromise. This sucks even more because although both our names are on the lease, I will have to pay the whole thing with her moving out. She hasn't paid any rent since Feb because she was waiting for me to make the move to this city and wanted to live together. I finally moved to this city last month and now this stupid issue came up. Since moving to our current city, she was able to get a job only this past Tuesday. I didn't mind paying for everything because I saw that she was genuinely making efforts to clean and find a job etc. However, I was looking forward to finally having some financial help! ughhh

    Another complication I need to figure out is that I bought us tickets to this dream music festival going on in July. It was planned with two other good friend couples. The festival tickets cost about 1250 each and includes accommodation. We have a big itinerary to hit up mykonos and santorini after the music festival. I don't know whether to try and find someone else to go with or leave some leeway for my gf and I to find a compromise. My friends are booking the airbnbs soon so need to figure this out soon. this sucks
    Last edited by thelonerange; 05-05-2019 at 01:37 AM.

  7. #16
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    Originally Posted by thelonerange
    Lots of good info in here, thanks for telling it straight everyone. I'm starting to feel really silly and immature. This is petty stuff and I should have more important things to do.

    She left Friday to her friends in another town and we haven't really spoken at all except her saying she was looking for rooms to move into in our city. We currently live together in a two room townhome by rental. So sadly, doesn't seem like there's anything I can propose to figure out a way forward and compromise. This sucks even more because although both our names are on the lease, I will have to pay the whole thing with her moving out. She hasn't paid any rent since Feb because she was waiting for me to make the move to this city and wanted to live together. I finally moved to this city last month and now this stupid issue came up. Since moving to our current city, she was able to get a job only this past Tuesday. I didn't mind paying for everything because I saw that she was genuinely making efforts to clean and find a job etc. However, I was looking forward to finally having some financial help! ughhh

    Another complication I need to figure out is that I bought us tickets to this dream music festival going on in July. It was planned with two other good friend couples. The festival tickets cost about 1250 each and includes accommodation. We have a big itinerary to hit up mykonos and santorini after the music festival. I don't know whether to try and find someone else to go with or leave some leeway for my gf and I to find a compromise. My friends are booking the airbnbs soon so need to figure this out soon. this sucks
    You donít need to figure anything out soon.
    Book the airbnbs as planned and suffer the loss financially.

    Thatís tickets i am sure wonít be transferable anyway.
    Forget about the festival until a couple weeks prior. You canít change it anyway!
    You are still being silly and immature!

    As for the rental , she is half responsible for that .
    You can always get a roommate.

    BUT all of this thinking is catastrophic and premature!
    I donít think she has done anything wrong particularly except behave immaturely. As did you!

    I think you should invite her over to have an honest chat, admit why you feel insecure, admit to snooping and further feeling insecure because of her responses but that you acknowledge what you did was wrong and apologise.

    Then see what she has to say!?

    The relationship may end and out of your control but at least have the maturity to have an adult discussion first!

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by Billie28
    You donít need to figure anything out soon.
    Book the airbnbs as planned and suffer the loss financially.

    Thatís tickets i am sure wonít be transferable anyway.
    Forget about the festival until a couple weeks prior. You canít change it anyway!
    You are still being silly and immature!

    As for the rental , she is half responsible for that .
    You can always get a roommate.

    BUT all of this thinking is catastrophic and premature!
    I donít think she has done anything wrong particularly except behave immaturely. As did you!

    I think you should invite her over to have an honest chat, admit why you feel insecure, admit to snooping and further feeling insecure because of her responses but that you acknowledge what you did was wrong and apologise.

    Then see what she has to say!?

    The relationship may end and out of your control but at least have the maturity to have an adult discussion first!
    Thanks I'm going to take your advice on the sit down. Hopefully will get that opportunity. Before leaving Friday, she was asking her friends if she can stay with them for a few weeks until she finds her own place. She also took virtually all her stuff and clothes with her. Later that night she also let me know she was looking for roomshares throughout the night. I'm sure she was spending most of the day today and tomorrow looking for rooms to rent as she has to come back into current city on Sunday (today) for work at the job she recently started on Monday. To me, that seems like a lot of effort to go through if still very angry. I think I have to just prepare myself for the fact that there's no interest in the sit down.

  9. #18
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    Originally Posted by thelonerange
    Thanks I'm going to take your advice on the sit down. Hopefully will get that opportunity. Before leaving Friday, she was asking her friends if she can stay with them for a few weeks until she finds her own place. She also took virtually all her stuff and clothes with her. Later that night she also let me know she was looking for roomshares throughout the night. I'm sure she was spending most of the day today and tomorrow looking for rooms to rent as she has to come back into current city on Sunday (today) for work at the job she recently started on Monday. To me, that seems like a lot of effort to go through if still very angry. I think I have to just prepare myself for the fact that there's no interest in the sit down.
    Yes sheís behaving immaturely and not facing up to her responsibility that she has a lease on a house.
    She is being dramatic and probably only to provoke you to fight for her rather than her face up to her doings.

    How have you responded so far?

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Billie28
    Yes sheís behaving immaturely and not facing up to her responsibility that she has a lease on a house.
    She is being dramatic and probably only to provoke you to fight for her rather than her face up to her doings.

    How have you responded so far?
    Oh on friday night she sent me a text that says "need space to figure out what I am going to do. will be coming back Sunday night to work towards putting the townhome on the market and moving on".
    I replied to that saying I already told the landlord I would take full responsibility since I 'honor my obligations' (was still angry myself). I then said she can pick up the rest of her stuff whenever shes able to and asked whats the point in even coming back Sunday then.

    I will say that I was annoyed that she was spending money to go to the other city when rent was due that day and I was again paying the full amount myself. I mean I wish I could just be the one to leave the place and be free of the responsibility. I got a nice place in the middle of a lot of nightlife/restaurants partly for her to be happy. However, I also understand that's not realistic as I make a lot more than her and the rent payment would be nearly her monthly salary. Without her, it's going to be nearly half my salary which is doable but a little outside my comfort.

    After that, no contact between us. I believe shes just been hanging out with friends and looking for a bedroom to rent in my city.

  11. #20
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    Originally Posted by thelonerange
    Oh on friday night she sent me a text that says "need space to figure out what I am going to do. will be coming back Sunday night to work towards putting the townhome on the market and moving on".
    I replied to that saying I already told the landlord I would take full responsibility since I 'honor my obligations' (was still angry myself). I then said she can pick up the rest of her stuff whenever shes able to and asked whats the point in even coming back Sunday then.

    I will say that I was annoyed that she was spending money to go to the other city when rent was due that day and I was again paying the full amount myself. I mean I wish I could just be the one to leave the place and be free of the responsibility. I got a nice place in the middle of a lot of nightlife/restaurants partly for her to be happy. However, I also understand that's not realistic as I make a lot more than her and the rent payment would be nearly her monthly salary. Without her, it's going to be nearly half my salary which is doable but a little outside my comfort.

    After that, no contact between us. I believe shes just been hanging out with friends and looking for a bedroom to rent in my city.
    Wow! You were THAT impulsive to contact the landlord?
    While I believe she is pulling some dramatics , she basically said she would see you Sunday.
    She may have been bluffing. But now she needs to proceed with her plans because you have already put her plans in motion.

    You are both so immature and impulsive that this actually canít work.
    I thought for a minute it could but you are both against it.

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