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Thread: Ex Boyfriend Messaged me; what now?! (Screenshot)

  1. #1
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    Ex Boyfriend Messaged me; what now?! (Screenshot)

    Last night- my ex boyfriend messaged me. We’ve been in an off and on again relationship for a while.. so I know I should not just jump back in and that I should take what he says with a grain of salt.. but what do you make of this ? [Register to see the link]

    what should I do? All of me wants to message back.. but none of me wants to get hurt again..

  2. #2
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    Step away from the hot stove.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    "Last night" looks a bit more like the wee wee hours of the early morning, when people are about as far from their true selves as possible. The drunk hours, the high hours, the lonely hours.

    Something tells me you've gotten these texts before—and "off" has become "on," at least until you are "hurt again." If you want another ride on the rollercoaster, shoot him a text back. If you're interested in a new, wilder ride that doesn't induce the same familiar whiplash—well, then I'd let this go.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Deciduous's Avatar
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    Hi Sullen,

    I'd pay attention to his actions...Not his words. I'm sure he means it. I'm sure he is lonely. Doesn't mean he's capable of a committed, stable relationship. The moment he feels you slipping away and moving on with your life?...the moment he tugs on the heart strings and uses words to fill the void his actions aren't able to fulfill.

    Honestly, I think you know the answer here...and it's alright to feel sadness, heartbreak and longing - but you were absolutely right in your response, as devastating as it was to say those words. It is better to be alone than continuously being yanked back and forth and watching your heart being repeatedly broken with no chance to heal.

    "No Contact" is one of the hardest, hardest thing you will have to do. It will break your heart, but it will also give you are chance to eventually heal it. At the moment it is being temporarily filled and re-broken, filled and re-broken. I been there. I've done it. And in time I've learnt...(in the words of Saluk) that it was time to "step away from the hot stove."


    Hugs

    Decixx

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    This relationship was described in your previous threads and posts not long ago. It was painful for you. I think you need a lot of time to heal. Take that time out and go over your patterns for dating. I think you are attracting people that are not good for you.

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    If you have been on and off, then why continue? This is not working.

    Block and delete.

  8. #7
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    If he is abusive, then why continue? Why do you allow this?

    Seek some therapy.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Ok... message back "get lost", then block and delete him from all your social media and messaging apps. That's the only way you can pull your self esteem together and stop cycling in this toxic situation.
    Originally Posted by sullensloth
    All of me wants to message back.. but none of me wants to get hurt again..

  10. #9
    Platinum Member SooSad33's Avatar
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    I know.. this is very hard :(
    But.. YOU are going to keep on hurting as long as YOU let this continue.

    HE is your EX... Time to work on accepting & healing.
    Everyone is correct... you have to walk.. and keep walking.. No matter how hard.
    I have even gone to the point of needing some prof help- as well as coming on here- to get me through.

    No contact is the way... hurts, I know. But, this on/off is only going to keep hurting YOU, when you already
    know it has not worked out - has it?

    Back away and stay away now. Expect nothing more.
    Time to TC of YOU.
    Get out with friend & family... keep busy and go about your own life.

    Keep working on you to get over this. Prof help if need be.
    Some day it will get easier- as long as you keep walking - away from all of this crap.

    The past has nothing new to say... One day at a time
    <3

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    There's a little fine print blue font thingy at the bottom of the screenshot that says "I don't want to hear from Miguel."

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