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Thread: am i doing the right thing

  1. #31
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    It's not weird. It's just basic and boring, frankly, and if you can see that you'll see it's just not worth getting in a knot about.

    He Snaps with you because, for reasons way too boring to try to unravel, that's the beginning and end of his comfort zone, as "intimate" as he can get. Surface stuff, shallow stuff, like the dude who will flirt in the hallway but won't ever ask out the girl. Even a text message, for instance, is too "heavy" for him, too "real," which is to say anything face-to-face will basically break him.

    That's just where he is right now. Where you are? Far above this nonsense, so no need to dip down into it. Block him, if you must, or just ignore it.

  2. #32
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    Imo, he snaps you because he can. Because he knows it "gets" to you which it has.

    It's a total mind f***.

    Whether it's intentional or not, hard to say but suffice it to say the man is an emotional mess, has issues deeper than any of us are qualified to understsnd or advise you on.

    May I ask why you have not blocked him?

    Are you hoping he miraculously comes to his senses, apologizes and wants to pick up where you left off?

    I see no other reason why you have not blocked him, or arranged for his messages to be sent to your trash.

    This is on you now michkath.

  3. #33
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Agree. He seems to fall into the category of "time wasters". Decide to redirect your focus on those worth your time and energy.
    Originally Posted by michkath

    Why does the guy keep snapchatting me :-/ . Yet doesnít respond to any of my texts

  4. #34
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    This guy likes the IDEA of a relationship, but does not have the capacity to actually DO it or have one. He'll stick with flirts on snapchat or quips here and there, but to have a conversation, even text message, is way too much. There will always be some crisis going on that prevents actually dating, and we question how much of these issues are real or not.

    There's way too much anxiety over something that barely had a chance to happen, and I think your best choice is to block him or boot him off of your social media or both. He's really not worth your time and energy. There are so many things in life that are out of our control. Don't purposefully invite something in that promotes insecurity and bad feelings. Throw this one back into the pond, OP.

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  6. #35
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    Reason I havenít blocked him
    Because what if his telling the truth about his two mates what if it was true
    The crying on the phone to me then after that his gone completely distant on me
    And Iíd look like a complete cow doing that to someone.
    Iíd feel so awful blocking someone if they are going through a rough time.
    He also accused me of blocking him which I never ever done.

    Iím not reaching out to him at all Iv not heard from him in a few days
    He snapchats me which is weird and really bugging me that he does that.
    I open his Snapchats
    And then I just clear the message and I pretend itís not even there.

    Iv gone back to dating apps as like you say I need to move on for my own sanity and my health.

    I was just wondering why heíll he snaps me but doesnít text.

    And Iím sure youíll know why I havenít blocked him
    Iíd feel just awful doing that.

  7. #36
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    I couldn't agree more with purplepaisly.

    It's tragic what has happened to him, but it's not a license to treat you like crap.

    Sometimes in life you HAVE to be selfish. Don't worry how people will view you, and don't put his well being ahead of yours. Your martyrdom won't be appreciated by him, if he even notices it.

  8. #37
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    Abit of an update -
    I see him over the weekend.
    He apologised
    As I said you didnít have to talk to me like crap
    And he said work , 2 of his mates ect have really got to him and he needed some space
    His been texting me etc and I have also given him space to.
    So Iím glad I didnít block him otherwise Iíd feel awful I had.

  9. #38
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    Originally Posted by michkath
    Abit of an update -
    I see him over the weekend.
    He apologised
    As I said you didnít have to talk to me like crap
    And he said work , 2 of his mates ect have really got to him and he needed some space
    His been texting me etc and I have also given him space to.
    So Iím glad I didnít block him otherwise Iíd feel awful I had.
    Was his apology unsolicited?

  10. #39
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    Originally Posted by Sportster2005
    Was his apology unsolicited?

    I didnít ask for an apology or anything
    I just said there was no need to take it out on me or any of your loved ones
    As apparently he said he ignored another group of friends as he was having a hard time
    He did seem very tired & stressed when I see him.

    It wasnít right for me to block him.
    If someone is having a hard time why block someone.
    I always give people the benefit of the doubt.

  11. #40
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    Iv noticed he hasnít been on social media this week.
    I text him on Tuesday and he text me back saying he was pissed off with work & all trains were delayed & sent me a pic on snap of all the issues at the station. His started a new job the same time aswell with all that bad news came on.

    I havenít heard from him since Iv left him to it.

    But I have reached out to him today asking how he is. And when will I be seeing him next.

    I havenít hassled him too much as I donít wanna look like a beg and also cause any form of upset.

    I just hope this doesnít effect us dating. And i hope Iím not wasting my time.

    X

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