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Thread: Really weird and unique situation, desperately need advice, he is my soulmate

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Apr 2019
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    Really weird and unique situation, desperately need advice, he is my soulmate

    So my ex boyfriend and I were together for a little over a year, we are each others first loves. We have shared many things with each other we have never shared with others, have done things for the first time for both of us together, just have very loving and special memories. We were long distance, I'm in America he's in England but at first it wasn't such a big deal until I was supposed to visit in February and things fell apart last minute. Distance got too hard and he started public school for the first time in a VERY long time. He started having friends like a normal teenager does (I went through this normally as Ive gone to public school my entire life) but he hasn't and quickly became infatuated with the idea of having friends who were there that he went to school with. He stopped spending more and more time with me and soon things fell apart. We still love each other very deeply, he has told me that he will forever love me and that maybe later we can get back together once things were better in terms of individual problems. I'm moving there in about two years and visiting this summer (we plan to meet up). I love him very much, we ended on good terms and did no contact for a while, he reached out a few times and is being a bit more than just friendly with me. He's been looking at my google photos (Thinking I can't see that he is) and doesn't seem to have any problems just talking to me and having fun. We have been texting a little more recently (all good experiences) and even called today and played some games. He's sent me a few selfies, knowing it makes me smile when I see them and I've sent them back. I'm trying not to think negatively, he seems excited to meet me this summer for the first time. It can be hard to not think of the negatives like what if he gets with another girl? What if we never end up together? What if I mess up? I've been watching a lot of Clay Andrews videos as he seems to be one of the better coaches (doesnt play mind games and focuses solely on the connection between the two and rebuilding it) they are very helpful. I'm trying to rebuild the connection in hopes we will get back together some day. What do you guys think? Do I have a good chance? I love him more than anything in the world and I'm not giving up on us. Im going to therapy and trying to work on myself as well. Any other advice about what I can do or how I can stay positive? Maybe even some inspiring stories would be nice!

    PS: I would like to add that a lot of weird phenomenons and crazy that doesn't usually happen that's related to my relationship happened while I was dating him and continue to happen afterwards, I feel like I'm living in a ing movie sometime

  2. #2
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    How old are you two? If he's still in school then he is quite young and it makes sense that in a new school he is meeting new people. You've never met? It's not a real relationship if you've never actually met and spent time together. I think he is busy adapting to a new social life and you on the other side of the world are taking second place, despite him texting you and sending selfies/photos.

    Yes keep on with your friendship but get the stars out of your eyes and stop romanticizing this relationship with a guy you havent met who's thousands of miles away. If you are both teens or early 20s this is when you meet others who could be potential partners and you date and you learn what you want and dont want in a mate. LDRs generally dont work. Hang out with your friends who live near you, do normal things girls your age do, expand your horizons.

  3. #3
    Gold Member
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    Apr 2016
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    You are not in a relationship with this cyber boy and clearly he has got bored of cyber chat and actually now wants to start living in the real world.
    You should do the same.
    Your situation is not unique. Unfortunately many teenagers are are succumbing to this sort of thing.
    There are hundreds , thousands of boys your age age similar to this guy in your local area. Yet you choose to stay in your bedroom chatting to one guy in another country . Why?

  4. #4
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Jul 2016
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    1,006
    Long distance relationships are very hard. Most don't work out.

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