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Thread: Is he being distant? Or it's just my intimacy issues?

  1. #1
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    Is he being distant? Or it's just my intimacy issues?

    This guy who used to have a crush on me on high school, texted me this August after 6 years. First I was cold because I thought we can't have something. We texted from time to time, some random flirty lines until mid January. Then from that time I don't know what happened, we got too close, it was intense and fast. He was caring, sweet and paid me full attention. I was still a bit hesitant cause I had never been in love and in a relationship. But it was beautiful. Then after two months I realised I'am in love. But suddenly I started to panic, I felt like I lost something. He started to get distant, not replying to me like always, prioritising his job, not mentioning the nice words to me anymore. When I tell him about this change, he sometimes denies it, sometimes tells he me it's just his routine, but when I start getting distant he gets angry. I try to show him that I care to the point of being clingy and emotionally dependent. I can't help but cry everyday. How can I handle this? I sometimes consider to end it but I think I might regret it later cause I'd think I let my issues get between us.
    What do I do?

  2. #2
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    Did you ever go out or have you just been texting this whole time?

  3. #3
    Gold Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Would you feel comfortable talking about what issues you have prior to this relationship or outside of this relationship? What does he mean it's his "routine"? The problem with your scenario is that you seem confident at first and then very worried all of a sudden and it might put someone else off. If he's not consistent you might also want to think about whether he's the right person for you at all. Long term relationships generally don't arise out of inconsistencies and unpredictable behaviour. Trust and respect have to be proven over time. If he's not doing that for you, regardless of your issues, this isn't the right person for you and vice versa.

  4. #4
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    Has all of this been by text?

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  6. #5
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    It might be helpful to date someone you see face-to-face instead of just penpals.


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