Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 13

Thread: I'm a thief and a liar..

  1. #1

    I'm a thief and a liar..

    Hello world,

    Brutally honest post here. I have to be honest with myself otherwise I'm not going to change... if that's even remotely possible.

    I'm 30 years old, married and in a full time job. It's minimum wage but I do enough hours to survive and with a combined income of my husband, we happen to do okay. But the truth is, I'm a liar and a thief. I am a compulsive liar, I lie about trivial things and I catch myself thinking "why did I lie about having a twin" or "why did I lie and say I was in the hair dresser when I'm at the shop getting milk...." I don't understand myself at all. On top of that, I'm a thief. It's not an impulsive act, I usually just wing it. I steal from work mainly, anything from a tea towel to an expensive vase ... if I know I can get away with it, I'll do it. I've even stolen from friends and family. I have no idea why I do these things, I just do them because I WANT something they have and then I end up not sleeping because I'm riddled with guilt. I even tell myself the repercussions if I get caught....

    I actually got caught stealing from my last job and I was fired, I made a massive deal out of it and eventually after an appeal I got my job back. Even though the whole experience traumatized me and left me feeling much less of a person ... I'm still continuing to steal and lie and steal ... My husband believes I'm a good all round person, but he's wrong and if I ever admitted my true identity he would leave me. When he discovered that I'd been fired, I swore blind it was a innocent mistake and that I wasn't to blame and he believed me. But he warned me that if he ever found out I was a thief that he'd be gone, end of. Can't blame him really, can you? His words were "There are 3 things I hate in the world, liars, thieves and murderers".

    Whenever I get the impulse to steal, I tell myself "I deserve that, I work hard" or "I got paid short this month because they messed up the payroll... I'm having it!"

    I really just want to be a normal, functioning, human being. I want to have a moral compass that doesn't spin like crazy. I want to feel like I'm on the other wise of life... If I really look at myself, I don't like what I see or who I am turning into. but no matter the consequences of my actions, I begin to return to type.

    Not exactly sure what to do with this. Writing this is making me squirm and cringe. But how can you trust what I'm saying? I'm also a liar, but ironically, everything I've written here is the truth.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    34,927
    Gender
    Male
    Have you researched pathological lying or kleptomania? Therapy could help you.

  3. #3
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    764
    At least you admit it, which is a good sign. I would suggest therapy with a psychiatrist (who is an MD). That way, he/she may help you to understand the reasons why you do these things and he/she might prescribe something to control the possible imbalance (neurotransmitters) in your brain. Wouldn't hurt to try.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    12,080
    You definitely need professional help.

    Admitting you have these problems is great, but unless you take the next step of getting help you will end up unemployed (at best) or with an arrest record or jail time and divorced (at worst).

    And you and your therapist can work on the best way to confess to your husband. If he sees you are getting help I bet he'd be much more forgiving.

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Central Canada
    Posts
    13,738
    Gender
    Female
    I really just want to be a normal, functioning, human being. I want to have a moral compass that doesn't spin like crazy. I want to feel like I'm on the other wise of life... If I really look at myself, I don't like what I see or who I am turning into. but no matter the consequences of my actions, I begin to return to type.
    Get a psychiatrist to diagnose you because whether your opening thread is the truth or you're just perpetuating another lie, you need to get yourself diagnosed and to work through what is most likely some awful upbringing that has you doing the things you say you do or making false threads up (whatever this opening post happens to be).

    But how can you trust what I'm saying? I'm also a liar, but ironically, everything I've written here is the truth.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    10,271
    Gender
    Female
    I am not going to diagnose you here (because I can't and don't know any better ) but I think there is a personality disorder that has all these same characteristics.
    I admire you acknowledgment. That's a good sign.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Central Canada
    Posts
    13,738
    Gender
    Female
    I agree its a "good sign" that she acknowledges but it's not so great if she doesn't get the profession help to work through what she's acknowledged.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    10,271
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    I agree its a "good sign" that she acknowledges but it's not so great if she doesn't get the profession help to work through what she's acknowledged.
    gotta start somewhere, right?

  10. #9
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Central Canada
    Posts
    13,738
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by reinventmyself
    gotta start somewhere, right?
    Yes, but it won't help her if she just keeps doing what she knows is wrong and immoral. Acknowledging her "ism" and then continuing has been her pattern.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Posts
    1,169
    Change the way you think. It's thrilling to see if you can get away with lying and stealing but remember the harsh consequences in the end aren't worth it nor is the remorse and regrets later.

    It's never too late to change. Become an honorable, trustworthy person especially when no one is looking over your shoulder. Then when you awake tomorrow morning, you can look at yourself in the mirror without any guilt.

    Live a good, honest life because you'll grow to love and respect yourself before others do the same for you. Being a decent human being will make your life smoother and peaceful. Think of the outcome for the long term.

    At the end of the day, nothing is more important than peace of mind. Make your troubles light or lighter. Then you will become a happy, content, secure person.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •