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Thread: Is it wrong to break up with your partner after they became paralysed?

  1. #101
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    Re Chris and Dana Reed, suggesting we got our info from People mag or cliff notes is insulting.

    I've read Dana's book, Somewhere in Heaven, and it's truly awe inspiring.

    And any thread that gets me thinking about something other than "does he/she still like me?" or the like, is a good thread imo, and do believe this thread may help Op as well, inasmuch as it gets her thinking too.

    I think it's good to question things sometimes, how we might react in a certain sit, for example.

    Again my opinion.

    Respect your opinion tho blue, will leave it at that.
    Last edited by katrina1980; 04-18-2019 at 03:42 PM.

  2. #102
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I apologize if I sounded a little flip.

    I guess what I'm saying is that I'm not sure the story of Chirs and Dana Reeves, inspiring as it is, bears much relevance to OP's situation.

    I'd argue that it could further set her down a path where she is using false and outsized barometers to test, understand, gauge, and feel commitment from a partner.

    And I'd argue that using such barometers, instead of fostering sharper tools of communication and self-exploration, might be a hindrance to finding, forming, and maintaining the sort of partnership that evolves into serious commitment.

    Edit out the fame and the tragedy, and the story of Chris and Dana Reeves is the story that everyone wants: ironclad love, unwavering commitment, growing and bonding through thick and thin. Great. That's not mysterious, and whether it requires the label or husband and wife or something elseówhatever, to each his/her own.

    But I think these inspiring, pinnacle partnerships are best built from a place of genuine communication and not tests, so for OP I'd be pushing for more of the former and less of the latter.

  3. #103
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    Apology accepted blue. :)

    Re the rest, it would be nice if OP herself returned to let us know what she thinks of this discussion, if it's helped or hurt.

    It appears she left the building after her first post, and this has turned into an 11-page discussion amongst ourselves!

    I still think it was a good discussion though.

  4. #104
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by katrina1980
    Apology accepted blue. :)

    Re the rest, it would be nice if OP herself returned to let us know what she thinks of this discussion, if it's helped or hurt.

    It appears she left the building after her first post, and this has turned into an 11-page discussion amongst ourselves!

    I still think it was a good discussion though.
    Yes, the elephant in this very compelling room is that the elephant left the room long ago.

    I have a feeling that OP stopped thinking about all this somewhere between five minutes and two hours after posting it.

    Which, for her, is honestly my hope.

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  6. #105
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    Yes, the elephant in this very compelling room is that the elephant left the room long ago.

    I have a feeling that OP stopped thinking about all this somewhere between five minutes and two hours after posting it.

    Which, for her, is honestly my hope.
    Same here.

    Iím not trying to be insulting to the OPer at all but I think the she forgot about the convo soon after posting about it, I believe that because I donít think it was ever a true concern, I think it was soothing her anxiety and once that feeling passed... well it was no longer important. Anxiety works like that sometimes. People in general work like that sometimes.

    And while the convo was deffinetely interesting, it just became an argument about morality, which much like political discussions, no one changed their minds. Interesting and yes compelling, but little to nothing to do with the OPers dilemma, especially bringing up Christopher Reeves...that just came completely out of left field... itís like a chick pulling out a t*tty to end an argument... I mean could there be a more extreme example...geez, sorry, Iím falling back into the debate! Lol. Disregard.

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