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Thread: I love my fiancé but I think about another man all the time

  1. #1

    I love my fiancé but I think about another man all the time

    I am currently in a loving relationship of 2 years and we are now engaged. I love this man a lot and leaving him is a last resort. However, I have recently got back in contact with another man I once had a great connection and shared a very intimate night with. I’m constantly thinking of this other man, when I’m around him I become giddy and get very upset when I realise I can never experience being with him ever again. I want to get married and have a great life with my fiancé but I’m worried I’ll regret not telling the other man how I feel and potentially sharing another amazing night with him. I know that the other man and myself are not compatible like my fiancé and I so no relationship would ever come from it. Do I act or are there methods to stop me feeling this way?

  2. #2
    Gold Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Valid questions and better now than later. If you are having second thoughts this badly, I think you owe your fiance an explanation and putting things on hold. At this point he doesn't deserve to be caught up in a loveless marriage with a deceptive person who's at this very moment speaking with another man who gives her butterflies.

    This isn't only about what you should do for yourself. It's also what you should do as a whole out of respect for your fiance. I don't feel like you're prepared for the seriousness or weight of marriage and all that it requires. Call off the engagement if you need to or simply block and stop speaking to this other man. The decision at this point has to be straight from the bottom of your heart and no bs either. You're that close to spending the rest of your life with one person.

  3. #3
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Why would you get back in contact with another man if you are engaged?

  4. #4
    Thank-you for you’re honesty. I haven’t spoken about this with anyone else so hearing someone say something is a eye opener.
    I do not want to lose what I have tried so hard to gain with my fiancé.

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  6. #5
    I didn’t extend the invitation to reconnect, we were placed on the same assignment where we had to work closely

  7. #6
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    Is the other man married?

  8. #7
    No, he is single

  9. #8
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    Do me a favour and think about how you would feel if the shoe was on the other foot? If your fiance came and said to you "I'm wondering if I'll be happy with this other woman so I'm going to explore it. Sorry but I can't help how I feel".

    How do you think you'd feel?

  10. #9
    I understand, I would feel like the world would crumble around me, everything would fall apart, I’d want to understand why they are feeling that way, if there was something I could do it resolve things

  11. #10
    Bronze Member Afireblue's Avatar
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    Major red flag if you feel this way about another man while you're engaged... not judging just a red flag in your relationship

    Marriage won't make this any better.

    How would you feel if he confessed he had these kinds of thoughts for an exgirlfriend???

    If I were you, I would spend some time apart to work out whatever is going inside you. DO NOT cheat on your fiancee... cheating crushes people. I hope you make the right choice

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