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Thread: Am I wrong to be pissed off at this?

  1. #1

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    Am I wrong to be pissed off at this?

    Just really need to vent out somewhere... so earlier on tonight me and my fiancť (who lives in another city so itís a long distance relationship ) were talking on the phone and the convo gradually got sexual - we normally make do with phone sex since we canít meet that often - so I said to him give me 5 mins I just need to go to the loo. I visited the loo and rang him back within 5 minutes but he didnít answer... I then waited around 15 minutes after which he messaged me saying Ďcoming in 5 minsí ... another 10 mins passed and he finally rang me. I asked what took him so long and he told me that his baby nephew (5 month old) was still awake (at 2am) and was playing in the room next door with my fiancťís sister so he went to say hi to the baby and ended up playing with him. And on top of that whilst my fiancť was on the phone telling me all this, his mom came in the room with the baby to say bye as she was taking the baby to put him to sleep. My fiancť sounded really tired by then so I said to him donít worry go to sleep weíll do it another time and he said Ďawww sorry we couldnít do our phone sex thing tonight.í I said itís ok donít worry I know youíre really sleepy ... we said goodnight and he went to sleep. Now Iím wide awake sitting here feeling so pissed off and I donít even know if itís normal for me to feel this way? I know my fiancť loves me and I know he really enjoys sex with me in real and over the phone but his attachment to his family is really annoying. Would you guys be pissed off at something like this?

    FYI- he lives in the house with both his parents, sister, brother and his brotherís wife and of course their baby... yes he is Indian thatís why itís a joint family and he hasnít moved out yet...he will move out after we get married.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Would you guys be pissed off at something like this?
    ... Nope! ...

  3. #3
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
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    I definitely would not be pissed off...

    You had to leave to go to the loo. How unsexy is that?! Not to mention, should he be mad at you for that? Absolutely not!

  4. #4
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    I personally wouldnít be. He wasnít being vindictive or malicious by playing with the baby by not taking your calls.

    I think youíre overreacting to something small. Which makes me wonder if there are larger issues at play you havenít addressed?

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  6. #5
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    No.

    Given that he is your fiance and it's an LDR you both need to work at overcoming scheduling problems.

    And, at least you know he's family oriented, and his family seem to be training him in father-hood skills if that is important to you!

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    With anyone you care about, you will have to learn to pick your battles. Learn when to bite your tongue and when to have a discussion about what bothers you. To put it in perspective, he wasn't out at a bar getting fall-down drunk. He wasn't cheating. He didn't ignore your call until the next day. He was playing with his nephew and in his mind, 25 minutes doing that wasn't egregious, and so he enjoyed himself, knowing you were awake and he'd be with you in less than a half an hour.

    People aren't puppets you can control and partners will always irritate you now and then. You have to learn to calm yourself and let little things slide or bitterness will build up in the relationship if you jump down his throat for every infraction.

  8. #7
    Super Moderator annie24's Avatar
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    I wouldn't be angry. Just bad timing - you had to go to the restroom and then he got drawn into a conversation with his family. These things happen.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    It's a baby for goodness sake. I would find it heart warming that he actually is sensitive like that and compassionate enough to go see the baby.

    I find it very cold of you to be angry about this and to not understand.

    I mean, if it was his sister and he just walked off to go chat about whatever, then maybe you have a point, but a baby!?! Come on.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    I might be temporarily disappointed to have missed out on phone sex but pissed off? No.

  11. #10
    Bronze Member Afireblue's Avatar
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    Yes it sounds wrong.

    You seem to be frustrated by other issues and taking this excuse to make a fuss

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