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Thread: Should I ask him out? Please, I would like your opinion about that situation ^^

  1. #1

    Should I ask him out? Please, I would like your opinion about that situation ^^

    Hi,
    I would like to have some advice please.
    So Iíve met a guy 1 year ago on a social media and weíre talking everyday but he is really really far, he lives at the other corner of the world and so, I havenít met him. Weíve talked a lot and weíve become very close, weíre kind of best friends but I think I like him in a different way.
    And the thing is that : I canít get what are his feelings (he already told me he loves me etc., some kind of dirty things and he already asked me out but we ended up saying that bcs of te distance, itís better we stay bff and it wasnít really clear tbh but he also told me a lot about his ex, it really was a hard breakup for him and I think it was some time after asking me out that he said he still loves his ex but Iím not sure...) and I donít think itís a good idea to confess to him bcs we have never met, itís only been a year weíre friends (even though it feels like we have always known each other) and thereís a big ages difference (4y) but Iím not sure thatís really a problem bcs despite that, weíre not that different...
    So should I wait some years and ask him out (if I still like him of course) after we met (if we do one day but Iím almost sure we will) ?
    But maybe heíll find a girlfriend before we meet and before I could tell him my feelings...

    There are just 2 things Iím not really worried about : to be rejected bcs he doesnít want to be on a relationship with anyone (he told me a lot he would like to have a girlfriend) and also to destroy our friendship by asking him out...

    Thank you very much for reading it and if you answer too! It would help me a lot to have someone elseís opinion!

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Is he married? Why are you sexting with someone you've never met? Have you researched/googled him? This could be a scammer or catfish and investing a year in this is preventing you from communicating with and meeting local men in real life. Cease contact with "him" and redirect your focus and energy into dating apps to find local men to message and date.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Developing a relationship with someone sight unseen rarely (if ever) works out the way people think it will. There is no way to know if you will have chemistry with the person once you are face to face with them, and it's pretty easy for people to hide who they really are behind a computer screen and only show their best side. It is in fact also common for people to not even be who they say they are and carry on relationships for years this way.

    Why do you want a romantic relationship with someone that you have never met? Don't you want the physical affection and emotional connection and intimacy that goes with being in the same room as someone?

  4. #4
    He's on the other side of the world and you will never see each other so what's the point in asking him out.

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  6. #5
    Bronze Member Afireblue's Avatar
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    How old are you if you dont' mind me asking?

    If this person lives lives at the other corner of the world by your own words, then how do you intent to "ask him out"

    I am sorry, but I think you have built a fantasy here, yes, you may be friends now but a real relationship takes effort and being there physically to get to know one another

    I would say continue to be friends, but don't engage in sexual talk, for all you know he is a stranger that may just be using you. Never send images of your self on the net, you never know where they will end up. Take care and be safe

  7. #6
    Yeah, I know that to like someone Iíve never met is stupid, I guess I shouldnít try to build friendships online...

  8. #7
    Gold Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    My dear girl, please get off the social media and don't pay attention men you can't see in the flesh. It's young girls like you that men like him prey on. You're young, impressionable, naive, looking for precious secrets to guard close to your heart, looking for security(someone to tell you you're his bff or online boyfriend) and nervous.

    Leave him alone and start worrying more about what's right in front of you: your schooling and your grades, your family, your friends in school and if you're stuck in a hole right now and need more freedom or independence, work on you. Start working on yourself now and your situation so that you are never in this vulnerable position ever again.

  9. #8
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Most long distance relationships don't work out. Why not just keep him as a BFF and find a local man to be your lover?

    You can only have one lover (supposed to) but you can't have too many friends!


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