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Thread: Should I go on?

  1. #1

    Should I go on?

    I've been in a relationship for 2 years and am still very happy in the relationship, but we both know it won't last. We are both currently in a military University and I am graduating in a year, he's graduating in two. We will be posted on different bases and our trades do not really coordinate well. He wants children, but I don't. It feels to me like we are doomed, yet meant to be together. Should I keep the relationship going until it's not possible to continue or break things off now even though I love him? I really need some advice on what you guys would do if you were me to help guide my decision.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    He wants children and you don't. That, to me, would be enough to just end it now. Sorry you have to go through a breakup but Either way, now or later, you are both going to hurt for a while.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    At the very point you had a discussion about major life goals, you should have broken up at that point. When one wants kids and the other doesn't, why on earth do you want to stay one second longer? Everything has to match when you're choosing a lifetime partner, and it takes a while to find someone who matches you in every important way, so don't waste time on someone who is on a totally different page in a major area.

    Sometimes decisions hurt but you have to do what's best for yourself. Take care.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Listen to Andrina!

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  6. #5
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    Not wanting children itís an important life goal. Heís not going to not want children because you wonít. Break up now before it gets more complicated. You both can find someone on the same path

  7. #6
    Thank you all for your help, it is going to hurt but you guys are right, have a great day!

  8. #7
    You're not meant to be together i'm afraid. You couldn't be more wrong for each other. Wanting different things, going different directions. That's about as incompatible as you can get.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    I would ask him. I'd put the question to him exactly as you've put it to us, and let him be the decider of whether he's willing to invest his time in someone who won't fulfill his long range goals.

    Consider what and who else you both may want to focus on while you're both in this place. If you'd be cutting things off with one another for opportunities to find a better match, then that's one thing. If not, consider that you'll already hurt from a breakup, so decide whether you want to do that prematurely for no particular payoff.


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