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Thread: Don't know if I should break up or not

  1. #11
    Platinum Member
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    Originally Posted by Lovelavie
    No, he has changed a LOT. And he thanks me for the fact that I also helped him in this process. But I feel like we're constantly "working" to get somewhere. We're never there. There's always so many issues between us. My parents were so happy for me that I finally was in a "happy" relationship. But today I woke up crying, anxious. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't know much about life, but I think that it's wrong to stay with someone that deep down makes you feel this way, even though he doesn't mean to.
    I agree.

    I suffered from terrible anxiety until my relationship with my ex ended. Magically, my anxiety disappeared. Vanished. And never came back.

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    I agree.

    I suffered from terrible anxiety until my relationship with my ex ended. Magically, my anxiety disappeared. Vanished. And never came back.
    Yeah, I have always had anxiety, but before him I was so much more confident in myself. Now I find myself constantly working on telling myself that his past means nothing. Even though his past is always in our present. Every freaking weekend I have to talk to a girl he's been with. It's exhausting.

    I'm crying as I write this, I blame myself for all of this. I wish I didn't feel this way but I do, and I just want it to end.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Then end it and solve your own problem. Behaving in one way but wishing for a different outcome is counterproductive and it won't get you anywhere. Try to find some peace. Wishing you peace in your decisions and more conviction in yourself.

    As others have already mentioned, there's a different way to live. Eventually once you find it, you'll realize you'll never go back to this type of living again. Value YOU and trust yourself more.

  4. #14
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    I never know if I'm making the right decision or not. I got attached to how much he's changed after he started liking me and how much he's done in order to be with me that I simply kept telling myself that I was wrong to feel this way. I do indeed believe the past is in the past, but it got tiring to meet with at least one girl he's been with on the weekends. I don't mind being around just don't like the fact that he acts normal to them, I feel humiliated actually and if he won't change that then I just have to leave...

    I feel sad, like once again I believe in someone and it didn't turn out as I expected... people in general are selfish idk...

  5.  

  6. #15
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    OP.. If your best friend came to you with your story, saying her BF doesn't work that the relationship is constant "work" and if she is just not happy anymore. What advice would you give her?
    I think what you were in was a "One way" relationship. Seemed like everything flowed in one direction. You to him. You did what you could to make him happy, but to make you happy there had to have been conditions met first.

    I think you already know the answer to all of your questions. You are not happy and you should of gotten out of the relationship. You don't trust him, you don't believe him, so why would you or anyone stay in a relationship like that? If he wants to better himself, he will have to do it for him, not for you. He is the one who is going to have to stand up on his own (or with daddy's money) and make a change. You cannot be the one who is constantly driving him to change. He has to change for him.

    In the long run, this is the best thing you could of done. This guy was just a dreamer and is waiting for something to happen instead of making it happen. You are the type of person who wants to make things happen. Find someone who is more aligned with you instead of trying to convince yourself or this guy that you two are go getters. Hey, he could be the nicest guy in the world, but that doesn't mean he is right for you. You are going to be just fine.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    coming in a little late, but why does an unemployed young man need to wait until next year to move to Australia. . on his dad's dime, no less?
    What is keeping him here, exactly?

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