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Thread: She wants us to start afresh

  1. #1
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    She wants us to start afresh

    I'd try to be as brief as possible. New poster by the way.

    mid-February I caught my gf cheating through a series of chats as far back as 3 months. Apparently she had gotten so close to another guy that by January this year, they were exchanging nudes. It wasn't a dating situation from d chats but two friends doing things. Apparently, Dy both had sex once in January but she ran away Midway into the act and for the next two weeks the guy kept pestering her to come over but she didn't go... Just yet... Till I caught her. She denied the sex for a week B4 later confessing to it and that she realized her error during d act n ran anyway she continued sending nudes n vice versa.(I confirmed this also tru d chats)

    Let me go back in time a lil. I have not been a particularly loyal bf. Am 28 n she's 22. When I met her she was everything including my "recovery process" when I got heart broken.infact I was her first sex mate. Though she's had bfs B4 me. I met her at 19 but in 2 yrs+ now she isn't yet at the level I wanted her to be. She has just basic high school education and not yet cut out for what she really wants to do with life. I am a banker and maybe I wanted someone closer to my level or at least would be ready to get married sooner but she wasn't.

    So after 2yrs, I met a lady about my age and she got attached to me. Then months later we strated dating, my gf found out and was mad. I told her how I felt about her current position. It wasn't really because I thought she wasnt valuable enough but I wasn't ready to puncture her chance of a higher education by bringing marriage in.

    So, I was actually double dating, am not innocent. Both ladies were aware as I couldn't hide and I tried to play a dual role. Yeah right.

    Now my gf has taken herself on a revenge ride and is sorry about it and wants to be committed regardless. Initially she already said she cared less about the other lady and then she cheated.

    She wants us back to normal but trust is lost on both sides. She's been crying and pleading. I av asked her to forgive me for cheating first but it's better to cut d relationship. She declined and here I am confused aw to handle it. I still care her and she's quite the calm type
    Last edited by laskillful; 03-25-2019 at 07:57 AM. Reason: Error

  2. #2
    You're a rather shallow and hypocritical man. If there is no trust then there is no future. You'll both live wondering and accusing each other of cheating all the time. You both should take a time out from relationships and realize how just how badly you have treated each other. Both your behavior is appalling.

  3. #3
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    That was harsh... Was that necessary? You should give a deep answer to a shallow person. How am I being hypocritical? I admitted my faults.
    Last edited by laskillful; 03-25-2019 at 08:21 AM. Reason: Error

  4. #4
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    What are the random letter "d"s scattered throughout your post? Do you mean "the"?

  5.  

  6. #5
    Silver Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    I agree with the advice given. You both are at fault and you have both lost trust with each other. Both of you need to take a time-out from this relationship and other relationships until you can figure out what you want from dating. If you just want sex, stay single. If you can't commit to someone, don't pretend that you can.

  7. #6
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    Yes... The

  8. #7
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    Thanks Sarah... I told her I wanted a break but she says I am only finding a way to let her go. She is not agreeing to a mutual breakup. She said she never loved the guy and has since totally cut him off.

  9. #8
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    When you have proof someone has cheated then for me it's a 'never again' situation regardless of what they say or promise.

    This goes both ways. You will never trust one another again and the cycle of for tat cheating will.continue.

  10. #9
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    Thanks ninjabib.. she claims she got engrossed in the chats but never planned to sleep with him, that was why she ran off like 2mins into the act. It doesn't matter does it?

  11. #10
    Originally Posted by laskillful
    That was harsh... Was that necessary? You should give a deep answer to a shallow person. How am I being hypocritical? I admitted my faults.
    Exactly, and you judge her for doing something similar. She seems to be the only one apologizing though.

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