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Thread: What did I do wrong? Did she set me up?

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Mar 2019
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    What did I do wrong? Did she set me up?

    Hi all,

    I am going through an arranged marriage process and we went to see a girl at their house with my family. Everything went ok but her third question was about my career which put me off a bit.

    They then came to our house and I asked a load of questions and I was speaking minimally as my conversation skills arnt too great.

    My family and her family then went into a room to discuss and she was standing by the dinner table on her phone. I was near her to give her company but then my brother asked her a question and she ignored it as she was on her phone. This kinda annoyed me and then I proceeded to sit down.

    We then speak for two weeks, I messaged her as like I said Iím not too good at holding down a conversation. She then messaged me saying she doesnít feel I am interested even though I was because I moved away from her at the dinner table and didnít call her over the two weeks.

    I have a feeling she set me up on purpose so I would behave in this way.

    What would you think? I havenít had any prior relationships with a girl.

  2. #2
    Silver Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    What happens if one of you doesn't want to get married?

  3. #3

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    Then we donít get married and we look for someone else.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Saqua
    Hi all,


    We then speak for two weeks, I messaged her as like I said Iím not too good at holding down a conversation. She then messaged me saying she doesnít feel I am interested even though I was because I moved away from her at the dinner table and didnít call her over the two weeks.
    So what did you respond back to her when she said that she didn't think you were interested?

    I have a feeling she set me up on purpose so I would behave in this way.
    There is zero indication that that is the case. It appears that she doesn't think you are interested because you haven't shown her that you are. You didn't contact her for two weeks and you've allowed your shyness to appear as non-interest.

    Maybe you ought to talk to your father or an older trusted relative that can give you some advice on how to relax around a woman and how you show interest (if you are). You say you are interested but you don't show her that you are.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Everything went ok but her third question was about my career which put me off a bit.
    Why would this put you off? Don't you believe that a potential wife may want to know about your career?


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