My(25M) girlfriend(31F) stopped talking to me a week ago...

Hey all, thanks for reading my post. So my girlfriend and I have been off and on for about 4 years now. We have broken up and gotten back together 3 times, all those times was her call. She felt that she did not reciprocate the same feelings as I did for her. Somehow we always get back together, I'm guessing as I stuck around due to becoming an attachment to her kid since the father left the picture. At the beginning of our relationship she was a new hire at my previous job, and I became her trainer, and got to know her background. Had a 2yo daughter, and was still living with the baby father, but was trying to leave as soon as she could. So I then ended up helping her leave that situation, got her into a new apartment. Then a newer apartment after that, by signing as a leaseholder for her and her daughter. I know that move is atrocious to some, but I really felt a connection and my kindness took the best of me during those moments.

So rewind to last week, we were on good terms. Just went and saw Captain Marvel with her and her daughter over the weekend. Had a blast, and enjoyed the movie! Then Monday came, she had an appointment early in the morning, so I sent a text to see how it went and if she was able to get to work. She responded happily telling me everything, and calling each other "babe" and sharing jokes. That evening she even called me on her way home, and we spoke until she pulled into her spot at the apartment. Now Tuesday rolled around, I had a Math final that I was low key stressing about, but I don't let stress show. So during the weekend, she gave me one of her debit cards to pick something up from the store before I came over to her place on Sunday. On that Tuesday afternoon, I sent a text asking if it was alright with her if I stop by her place to heat up some food before I head to my final since the apartment was closer to my school than my place. She responded with "yes" nothing else. Which felt strange, but she just started a new job so I thought nothing of it, maybe just too busy to add anything else. So I thanked her, and she sent another text to drop the card off when I go which I replied with sure. So I got off, went straight to her place, popped my food in the microwave, cleaned the leftover dishes that they had in their sink and went to use the bathroom before I ate. I quickly ate cleaned my bowl, and decided to head out early since its my final. So I got off work at 4, got to her place at ~430, was done with everything and headed out at 445 to get an early start on my final.

So I get to class, and started my final. It was ~510PM when I started. I then got a text from her closer to 6PM, "where's the card." At that moment I realized that I had forgotten to leave the card when I went to her place. I sent a reply back saying "sorry babe I forgot, may I drop it off after?", then got a response demanding that she needed it now. So I literally stopped my exam, got in my car, and gunned it to her place. I got there and she also requested for me to bring her kids car seat in as I had a spare in my car for emergencies, and for the fact that her brother was coming into town and they always need an extra car seat as her brother has a 5yo as well. So I ran inside and laid the car seat down, and ran to the bedroom to leave the card on her dresser. She was about to take a shower, and I confronted her to apologize and tell her in a rush that I need to get back to school since I started my final. She was totally silent, didn't say a word. That REALLY felt weird. But went to class, and finished my final. Then the following day, I was busy finishing up a final for an online class after work. That day I wasn't able to text her at all. Now on Thursday I sent a good morning text asking how she was, and that I finally finished all my finals but needed to review some things over the weekend and I will be completely done for the semester. I got no reply. Throughout the day I sent 3 random texts, one had a trailer for the new avengers movie, the second was a picture joke, and the final was a question at 8PM was asking which sling package we got a month back for her since we decided to drop Comcast due to cost. Never got a reply. I thought it was due to maybe her stressing to get her house ready for when her brother arrives later in the evening. Didn't think much of it. Now Saturday came and I sent the final text I've sent asking how she is doing, and if she was out enjoying the weather. NOTHING.

So yesterday, Tuesday, I had to contact someone because her silence was disturbing me. Like the thought of her hurt or something happened in the family and she was just unavailable. So I ended up texting her brother asking if he came into town over the weekend, and if so was she okay? He called me later around 9 and advised that he did come into town, and something felt off since I wasn't there and it now made sense. He gave me his own advice, and said to give her some space, maybe something is troubling her financially or elsewhere and to give her space and for her to come talk to me about. But also said to keep in contact with small talk like asking how her day was, etc.

Starting on Thursday of last week she posted a picture caption on Instagram, with the quote "Life is like a book. Some chapters are sad, some are happy, and some are exciting. But if you never turn the page, you will never know what the next chapter holds." I liked it thinking maybe it was dealing with family as I knew there was a lot going on recently with her dads health and what not. So I liked the picture and moved on. Now today she posted a self made post "PEOPLE DON'T REALIZE HOW HARD YOU'RE RIDING FOR THEM, UNTIL YOU PARK!" and it has me very worried.

I want to confront her and ask if we may speak and go over whatever it is that has her upset, but I don't know the proper way to approach the matter. In the past situations, when I try and keep contacting her when she's gone ghost it seemed to annoy her, and when we would meet and FINALLY talk her response is that I was being so clingy and she wanted space. BUT SHE NEVER WOULD TELL ME THAT! I could never wrap my head around that logic, how am I suppose to know you wanted/needed space when you just ghost me like that with no warning? So now with what is going on currently, I am fighting with myself on reaching out to her. God knows I want to, but then a piece of me is shouting to ask how she is or if we can talk, because its starting to worry me. But then again if I go that route, which is what I have done in the past, it may cause issues or speed up the process for her to let go of what we have.

Currently I still have a spare key, and she hasn't asked for it back yet, so that gives me some sort of hope. And some other bills that are under my name are still under my name, just payment information was updated recently.

So now I just need a second opinion, do I give her this "space?" Let her come to me? To me I am a fighter for what I want, I can't stand to sit back and let things come to me. And the thought of not speaking up and asking about her makes me think that she may think I don't care. But honestly I tried multiple times last week, and got no response so I don't know...

Does this really sound like a healthy, mutually-fulfilling relationship to you?

She's dumped you three times, man. You run around catering to her and walking on eggshells because you're afraid of losing her, but OP, I think it's time for a reality check: this woman does not have much respect for you, and doesn't feel the same way that you do about her.

You cannot reasonably continue a relationship like this. She is not in it for the same reasons you are. Giving her "space" so she can continue to rudely ignore you is just a symptom of the dysfunctional dynamic you two have.

EDIT: Perhaps she's distancing herself so she can keep inviting men over, as she was trying to do back in August? https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=553285

It was an extremely bad move for you to co-sign anything for her. She is treating you like crap and you keep coming back for more.

Return all of her stuff, tell her you're moving on, and hope to God she doesn't move and dump the rental agreement on you.

Hey thanks for respo

You're being such a doormat my god. Muster up your last shred of self respect and block her and put this crap behind u. The lease thing u have to sort out. Don't ever do that again. Talk about white knight syndrome.

And never act like such a puppy dog again. Bending over backwards when someone is obviously not feeling the same way leads u nowhere.

Omg. I just read your last thread that MissCanuck reminded us about.

OP, you are letting her run all over you. I don't even know what to say at this point. Are you happy this way, continually giving in this relationship while you are shown NO respect whatsoever? And you are asking if you should give her "space" when in reality that's just her choosing to ignore you?

I don't know. I worry you'll keep posting about this woman but never leaving her.

She'll contact you the next time she wants you to pay for something.

Seriously, you've been posting about breakups with her for two years (and been giving her money in some form or another that whole time). Stop trying to buy her love. It's not working.

Oh god he was the one that wrote that post?

How can anyone be this ... Lost.