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Thread: One night stand with coworker now pregnant

  1. #11
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    I hope she has learned her lesson about one night stands, no condoms, and sex without commitment.

    I'm thinking that she won't make the most responsible mother. Better to terminate the pregnancy as soon as possible.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Bear in mind I've never been single and pregnant, but I'll veer out of my lane anyway. I can't imagine that innately and often debilitatingly stressful situation will be done any favors stirring up **** with a man and his family. As I said before, it's not that I think he's a gem by any stretch, but it's 100% risk, 0% reward playing the vindictive other woman here, assuming he hasn't indeed been simply trying to work things out with his child's mother and it not being a done deal for him to have actually cheated.

    The result will be the same. If the kid's his and she keeps the child, he's on the hook to pay up. Starting a firestorm to "make him step up" would most likely accomplish the exact opposite if she would like for him to amicably co-parent in any capacity. Not to mention the fact they're coworkers and that Pandora's got an entire other box you probably don't want to get petty and risk opening there.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by RayofLighten
    He's trying to get out of his responsibility and not have his current gf find out. He's half to blame for this. Tell his gf, make him step up and stop being an ass.
    You canít force someone to be a parent. Even paying child support could potentially be a fight. All she will do by injecting herself into his relationships is cause stress and drama and push him even further away, not to mention the ridicule and cruelty she will experiences from the baby mama and him. Iím talking Jerry Springer levels.

    This was not a relationship. Does he have a right to keep his child a secret absolutely not he made a choice and lied down in that bed unprotected just like she did, but the easiest route to take is through the courts. Creating new Facebook accounts chasing him down, all completely useless, you canít force someone to be a parent.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    I agree, jman. The result will be the same except a lot more stress on the woman and distraction from what actually matters: making a decision about this pregnancy and then moving forward and taking care of herself and situation. She has enough on her plate and stressing her body already.

    There is no legal obligation on this mans part to care. It's harsh, but it's the reality we deal with. That's why it's important to choose wisely when deciding on who your child's father will be.

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  6. #15
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    A one night stand and pregnant? This may not be a popular thought, but probably abortion would be the best for all involved. If not, then adoption.

  7. #16
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    Is she a responsible adult? Has she ever expressed wanting kids? Then why not be a single mom, and forget about this immature chump she slept with?

  8. #17
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyMayPorter
    Is she a responsible adult? Has she ever expressed wanting kids? Then why not be a single mom, and forget about this immature chump she slept with?
    A responsible adult would know what the potential consequences can be with having unprotected sex. With that said they're both equally responsible for the use of birth control. If she chooses to go through with the pregnancy, why should he be off the hook with regards to paying child support?

  9. #18
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    She will need a paternity test once the baby is born, if she doesnt have an abortion first, which I think is the best idea. Then if it's his child she does the paperwork for child support and he pays til the child is 18. Or she gives it up for adoption.

    This is an example of how stupid some people can be. There's no reason for anyone to have a one night stand with unprotected sex.

  10. #19
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    First - he is trying to ignore his role and responsibility. So he gets no say in what happens next - that is how it is.

    Secondly - It is entirely up to you whether you keep the baby or not. There are all sorts of things to consider here. Talk to a counselor experienced in this area.
    You may have religious or philosophical beliefs that will impact your decision, but in the end, it is your decision.

    Thirdly if you choose to have the child, then after it is born get a lawyer and at least enforce the father's financial obligations to assist.

    Lastly, at least he has a job. Things could be worse.

  11. #20
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    If it is you, it sucks you feel to write in third-person to avoid personal unnecessary judgement and criticism, sorry this happened and whatever you (or your friend) decide, stay strong. There's nothing anyone here can say to change your mind because it is your own decision that you (or your friend) strongly feel

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