Jump to content

My confused level is at the peak with a new girl i met


mrk012

Recommended Posts

So in a nutshell i met a girl recently who was very much my type, we were working together for a day (acting job - ill explain more if thats intriguing to you lol) and during the course of the day she was telling me about herself, the self employed work she does, telling me about her life, her family and how those dynamics worked and generally getting to know me so i responded by opening up a little bit about things about me and my work etc which she seemed really really into.

 

She was making sure she was coming over to wherever i was etc and making sure we were conversing (just as was i due to her attention) and i felt a hell of a connection with her if im honest and from what i witnessed, she was the same.

 

Now alongside all this she was telling other people we were working with about her work and was constantly asking for peoples social medias to connect (just literally asking for instagram or facebook as shes a network marketer) so she could show them what she does but with me she came up to me and asked me if she could have my whatsapp number (ie my phone number) so i gave it to her and we chilled. Now heres where the confusion comes in. Towards the end of the day she started telling me how she has been with some guy for like a month and that its going well etc. From this point i kind of switched off a little bit due to how the day had gone and then hearing this new piece of information. She went on to inform me she doesnt really like dating people of her own race (which we are the same basically) and shes dating out of her race but she said i was very different.

 

We finished work and she basically waited for me (as i seem to take longer then others getting changed lol :smug:) to walk to the car park with me to our cars and gave me a little hug and we both agreed we will be in contact.

 

Since then (this was just over a week ago) she has contacted me once herself to talk about good vibes etc and other then that ive messaged her a couple of times but havent really spoken to her about pursuing anything on that level as she is with somebody. So now im in a situation where i dont know what to do, do i call her out on it and ask her on a date, do i just delete the number n leave fate to it?

 

Ladies mainly whats your take on this from a female perspective ??

 

Thanks for your time in advance all!!

Link to comment

Unfortunately, you'll need to let this one go because she's with someone. Her being with someone makes all other potential options redundant. If she breaks up with her boyfriend at some point, she can get in touch with you and you can both decide then if you want to pursue dating. Until then, it doesn't bear thinking on because there is no option. You don't need to block her or delete her number, just stop reaching out completely (and also don't accept her continued contact with your either - if necessary, make it known that you're interested in her but understand she's in a relationship at present, so you don't wish to cross that boundary. If her situation changes, then and only then are you open to talking) and if opportunity in the future to connect occurs, then you can re-visit that then.

 

Of course, if she's not in a relationship and simply dating people then that's another story as many people date several people at a time until they meet someone they want to become exclusive with; however, I'm getting the sense that that isn't the situation here and she's in a relationship. She's not an option at present, so let it go.

Link to comment
Of course, if she's not in a relationship and simply dating people then that's another story as many people date several people at a time until they meet someone they want to become exclusive with; however, I'm getting the sense that that isn't the situation here and she's in a relationship. She's not an option at present, so let it go.

 

She wasnt very clear on this and it seemed more honey moon period happiness lol. Either way good advice.

Link to comment
She will cheat on you if she's willing to cheat on him. Move on.

 

Nobody is looking at cheating or anything, and i do agree with what youre saying if you can do one thing to one person u can certainly do it to another but who knows

Link to comment
Nobody is looking at cheating or anything, and i do agree with what youre saying if you can do one thing to one person u can certainly do it to another but who knows

 

The way you described her, she was entertaining the idea of being with you while being in a relationship.

 

An emotional affair is still an affair.

Link to comment

It's amazing how people are blinded with their rose colored glasses when an attractive person is paying attention to them. Imagine if you'd date her for a month and everything is going well, and she's giving out her phone number to other guys she finds cute and nice and asking a guy clearly into her for his digits. As Maya Angelou said, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."

Link to comment
She wasnt very clear on this and it seemed more honey moon period happiness lol. Either way good advice.

 

The very fact that she mentioned she is seeing someone is her putting a line in the sand even if she hasn't respected her own line. The fact of the matter is, she's not available at present. I know it must be disappointing to hear because you felt a good connection with her and were excited at the potential prospect of getting to know her on a romantic level rather than a platonic one, but that option isn't on the table. Perhaps at some point she will be available. Until then, being confused is wasted energy on a moot point.

Link to comment

She seems a bit loose and not very subtle. If that's your cup of tea, it's up to you. I don't see what you have to lose.

 

You might want to keep in mind her profession as a network marketer means that her personality has to match if she is to be successful at her job. She may also be using you as a contact to further herself or propel her closer to someone else. If I were you, I'd be observant and not take the bait just yet. Wait and see what's in it for you.

Link to comment

meh... if I met someone that was attracted to me and vice versa and they told me they were in a relationship they would be off my radar as soon as that information entered my brain. I have zero desire to help someone be shady by cheating on their bf/gf.

Link to comment

It sounds like she's extroverted, friendly and doing a lot of networking. Unfortunately telling you about her dating life is a friendzone indicator. There is nothing to "call her out on" and no, don't ask someone out who just told you she's "been with some guy for like a month and that its going well". Just view her as connection, acquaintance, colleague, whatever.

she started telling me how she has been with some guy for like a month and that its going well etc.

i dont know what to do, do i call her out on it and ask her on a date, do i just delete the number n leave fate to it?

Link to comment

Just like everyone else is saying, she's seeing someone, so do not consider her an option. If she crosses that line and cheats, who's to say she won't do the same to you, and this will always be an issue in the back of your mind. Best to leave it be. Consider her actions are her social and flirty way of drumming up business, and that's all it is.

 

She told you about this guy she's seeing and her issues on race...it seems to me she might be hinting at you she is not interested because she does sense your attraction to her. Granted, her behaviors seem like she is attracted to you as well, but people can be attracted but not act on it. I really do wonder if her actions are more in line with being flirty to network for her business, either your business or your referrals.

Link to comment

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...