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Thread: Need help with my ex!

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Mar 2019
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    Need help with my ex!

    So basically, im 17, aswell as my ex girlfriend. We were dating for about a year and a half but I decided it was time to end the relationship last week as we had many problems which lead to continuous arguing. Literally everyday... I used to get home from work and straight away smile when I see her and kiss her but now it was like I walk in and we just moan at eachother straight away(was like this for many months). Eventually I had enough and I ended the relationship, it was a challenge though because she is very 'clingy'. I told her the reasons of the breakup and that was it. But now she is messaging me and has told me that she will get herself sorted out to stop our arguing and ect... she has even gone to speak to someone about it and is assuring me that if we get back together it won't be the same as before. The only other issue I have is, she is the only girl I have f**ked. And i don't want to reach 30 years of age and have only been in 1 girl... I do love her to peices and ever since she has gone my life has been completely empty, it just feels like the only thing I was living for is gone. I don't know what to do with myself as I want to go explore new things with new girls but I want my loved one with me aswell. * And no I would not get with her and be messing with other girls, I do generally love her.

    P.s. sorry for the extremely long para just wanted to make sure I got everything in there. Thanks.

  2. #2
    Silver Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    And i don't want to reach 30 years of age and have only been in 1 girl...
    Yeah, you have strong feelings for her but you are young and not ready to be in love yet. Plus, you argue too much. The best couples have only a handful of arguments a year. Instead, they halve a calm conversation about things and they compromise.

    If you do decide to move on from her, in time, your pain will fade; time is the great healer.

    I'm sure things will work out as they were meant to.

  3. #3
    Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    You've ended it.
    Leave it as it is and don't go back on your decision. You've expressed strongly that you were unhappy with each other. What she has to work out, she needs to work through on her own. She too will learn from her mistakes as will you.

    What's very telling to me is that you're concerned about spending your life knowing only one woman. This is vanity speaking and if you are consumed about yourself and what you want or there's a significant amount of thought going into what you need outside of a relationship, you do not love her. You may have emotional ties which are habitual over time and you may be afraid of being alone but you don't love her. Don't fool yourself. Love is pure and it wants the best for the other person.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
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    You need to be more independent. Your relationship did not sound healthy. Do you have friends or social life?

    Let her work on herself . This will take time. I suggest you date others and have fun. You are young.

    You also need to cut all contact. If the relationship is meant to be, you can address it in The future.

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  6. #5
    Bronze Member
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    Go experience the world before deciding what you want. It will just hurt you both more when you separate later.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Agree. Based on your vocabulary and attitude you sound way too immature to be in a relationship. Try just casual dating.

  8. #7
    Member PerkyGreek's Avatar
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    People at your age generally do not have things worked out in their lives. Your brain is still developing and instincts and reflexes are generally (again generally) still “raw” in a sense. So the more things you are involved in that are not helping you towards what you plan to be someday can be wasteful distractions. There are lots of guys who regret getting into relationships at a young age because they see how other people have focused on getting somewhere first before they let passion and pleasure be a big part of their life. I am not saying that you avoid it but you have to ask yourself if you can handle it. The fights might be because of immaturity as one already said, or too many things going on. And do not worry about being 30, you have a lot of time to find a good relationship, but a big factor of that good relationship is what you bring into it.


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