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Thread: Boyfriend keeps cheating on me

  1. #21
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    Originally Posted by SeniorCitize
    Because I love him and have fun with him. He has a kind heart. Maybe too kind, when his ex is involved. I keep telling him that he needs to cut the apron strings to her.
    Your title says he is cheating on you. Which is it?

    You know what's going on, and if you choose to disrespect yourself in this manner, then that's on you.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SeniorCitize
    He says he didn't have sex with her during the last years of their marriage, why would he all of a sudden have sex with her now.
    You're not blind, you simply don't want to see. It boils down to why. What fear is so big that all this avoidance is the path you choose? Being alone?

  3. #23
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    Like I said before, it would be perfect if she wasn't in the picture. Maybe it's because they were married for so long. She had cheated on him and that's why they got divorced. He tells me that he doesn't want to get back with her, even if we were to break up. He's a great person when she's not involved.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It sounds like they are too close for comfort but with their age and length of their marriage that is unlikely to change. It sounds more like they have become some sort of best friends and still depend on each other a lot more than "cheating".

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  6. #25
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    Wiseman2: that's kinda what he tells me. He says they get along better now that they are divorced than when they were married. It still bothers me. I asked him if the people were reversed, and I spent a platonic weekend with an old boyfriend, he said he'd break up with me. Why does he think it's ok to "hang out" with her? He said he realizes it hurts me, yet he did it again last weekend.

  7. #26
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    I'm a bit confused now too, you said they're not having sex, but yet you say he's cheating?

    Can you clarify OP?

    You say you love him and have fun. I get that!

    But do you love yourself? I presume you do otherwise you couldn't love another (him).

    Loving yourself means respecting yourself and staying true to yourself and your own values, needs, wants, desires.

    Translation: When something, someone, situation is continually hurting you, you take care of yourself by extricating yourself from that or whom is hurting you.

    Not saying he's a bad guy, he's not, but the bottom line is this hurts you.

    So take care of you, choose to respect you, love you.

    Wish him well and walk away, look for a man whose situation with his ex or whatever, doesn't hurt you.

    Doesn't that make more sense than remaining in a situation that is hurtful to you?

  8. #27
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    It's all on you. You choose to stay with a cheater. Don't keep sticking your face in the fire and still be surprised every time you get burnt.


    Why wouldn't you end things? He doesn't respect you or love you. His actions are the only thing you should look at.

  9. #28
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    Originally Posted by SeniorCitize
    Like I said before, it would be perfect if she wasn't in the picture. Maybe it's because they were married for so long. She had cheated on him and that's why they got divorced. He tells me that he doesn't want to get back with her, even if we were to break up. He's a great person when she's not involved.
    She is not the problem, he is. He is cheating on you with her, because he still loves her.

    She is the priority. There is no reason why he should be spending time with her.

  10. #29
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    But she is in the picture.

    He isn't going to stop. Why should he? He gets her AND you.

    You have two choices. Stay with him and accept being cheated on or leave and stop being cheated on.

  11. #30
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    Originally Posted by SeniorCitize
    He says he didn't have sex with her during the last years of their marriage, why would he all of a sudden have sex with her now.
    I don't know, why don't you tell us, you're the one who has accused him of cheating.

    What makes you think they're having sex now?

    I swear, I feel like I'm reading an episode of the Twilight Zone on some of these threads. Lol

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