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Thread: Stressing about living alone

  1. #1
    Platinum Member Jetta's Avatar
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    Stressing about living alone

    Ok I got my subsidized rent rate. It's 200 more than I pay mom. Money wise not concerned, but socially I'm concerned. I'm thinking of ways to combat loneliness. Exercise at gym at night. Call mom to talk after work. Spend day off at mom's.

    Mom really wants me to stay with her, but my family is talking about moving out of state. Which had the realization I'd really be alone hit me. However, now the opportunity for subsidized is presenting itself. My daughter is here. I can't leave the state yet.

    My therapist has said unlike my family I can't afford to up and move, I don't agree totally. The fear of loneliness is really getting to me though. Makes me wonder if I'm making the right decision. Mom says I'm not. Says she needs the money I pay her, living alone isn't all its cracked up to be.

    I'm mostly decided to move, just dealing with fears.

  2. #2
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    Have you tried going out to the city or town more? Tried to talk to people to combat your loneliness?

    If not, try it.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    I would use the time you CAN still live with Mom to start developing your social life as a project. Then by the time Mom moves, you'll have the skills to better manage living on your own, and you'll have more money saved to make the transition financially easier as well.

    Change just for the sake of change has been your default behavior for years. I'd test how well I can fight that urge in order to operate in my own best interests, instead. Saving money while you build a social life makes sense, and it would resolve your fear of loneliness, which has caused you to make poor choices in the past.

    Ask you therapist help you to make a plan for building the kind of social life that will build your confidence and teach you how to bond with your community so you won't feel so isolated within it. Then by the time Mom moves, you'll have a social network in place and you'll be able to thrive instead of survive.

    I'd learn how to navigate before attempting to fly.


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