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Thread: Is it bad to ‘see’ two people at once?

  1. #1
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    Is it bad to ‘see’ two people at once?

    So, I was seeing a guy for 2 months, things was okay but we often sat in his room, and just either watched movies or have sex. Which is fine but when we did go out I always forked the bill and he never offered (not that it’s an issue I’m all for equality). We text every now and then but it isn’t interesting conversation.

    I started speaking to a guy I use to see last year again, he reached out to me, we got chatting, met up and conversation flowed well, we had a laugh and enjoyed the evening. I’ve seen him a couple times and he’s booked a weekend away for us which was a surprise one which was super sweet. He’s more of a gentleman then the other one and seems to be up for doing more things.

    I just wanted to know if it’s ‘okay’ to see two people at the same time. No one has asked to be ‘exclusive’ and it’s not ‘serious’ just dating.

  2. #2
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    I guess it depends if it's ok with them. To me personally, I wouldnt like it if a girl I'm dating for a few months was also dating another guy for that time too (I guess I'd ask to be exclusive by some point), but thats just me, somebody else could be different.

    You speak of the first guy as if he is some bad person/you dont like him, then why do you still date him? Are you afraid of being single? Do you like it when somebody is stroking your ego while you are looking for something better? Are you still deciding? You dont have to answer these questions here, answer them to yourself and you will know.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Doing netflix and chill for 8 weeks is enough time to realize it's not working for you. Why bother? Simply tell him you're not compatible and end it. It's not bad/good, right/wrong it's about not wasting your or anyone else's time.
    Originally Posted by NYCBrooklyn
    I was seeing a guy for 2 months, things was okay but we often sat in his room, and just either watched movies or have sex.

    I started speaking to a guy I use to see last year again, he reached out to me, we got chatting, met up and conversation flowed well, we had a laugh and enjoyed the evening. I’ve seen him a couple times and he’s booked a weekend away for us which was a surprise one which was super sweet. .

  4. #4
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    It doesnt sound like guy 1 is all that interested in you beyond having sex with you. Why not forget about him and see guy 2 instead?

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  6. #5
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    I liked him, but my friend found him on tinder, so my opinion of him went down. I like to know where I stand and when I wasn’t given an answer I backed off. This is why we barely speak now.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    I'd drop guy one since in doesn't seem leading nowhere and then I'd see how things go with guy 2.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    I love how this question is posed, guy one is a non starter, which is most likely why you’ve continued to date but apparently you enjoy having him there as backup.

    Your question at its core to me is:

    Is it ok to monkey branch into a new relationship, I’m afraid to be single first.

  9. #8
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    While I appreciate you have taken the time to read and reply to my thread. I just want to make you aware I have been single for 2 years and have just got back into dating. Just to clarify

  10. #9
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    No it's not. Of course it's not bad. Not going to go all 'when I was young' on you but yep, I've been known to 'see' two+ at the same time - because I could, at the time, in my previous life. Because I was young. Enjoy it for what it is, whilst you can.

  11. #10
    It's down to what sort of relationship you have with the person. If you have a boyfriend that accepts what you are doing someone in an open relationship then it won't be something that conflicts with him. If he is against it then he is likely looking for a faithful person and not someone who has someone else. Personally I prefer to be faithful to only one man and stay with him and only him but then that is because I'm the loyal, committed type who wants to settle down and stay with one man forever.
    I would never stay with a man who was dating another woman because I would feel like a meaningless object to him.
    If I was a piece on the side I would feel like a convenience and of no value to him which would cause me to leave him.
    I hope this helps. It's for you to determine what's right and wrong as only you can make your decisions.

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