Originally Posted by Dreamtooloud
I will admit that reading the words "end goal" is confusing for me. I think I've not ever wanted an "end goal" again after being married so when I find myself in these situations, I really am confused and hurt.

I appreciate your bluntness, I wasn't trying to be argumentative with my responses. It's just so hurtful that a human being that I let in so much just went completely cold on me for no reason. I will also continue to call him out for cheating if he does that--mainly because the way he left it was with us maintaining the relationship that we had. Being in a polyamorous situation, yes--you do see other people, but you are always up front about that (I am ethically poly). If he didn't want anything at all, then he shouldn't have agreed to continue on and continue to talk to me. That's just idiotic and I'd hope he was smarter than that.
Honey... you are not getting it. He didn't leave it with you maintaining the relationship that you had. He clearly told you that he didn't want to do that. In fact, he's thousands of miles away so its impossible for you to continue on in the relationship you had. He agreed to keep you as an possible occasional hook up partner (which you basically agreed to when you compromised your own end goal (of moving to be with him if he wanted it too) and compromised to accept what little he is willing to give.

Its not up to him to decide what you want when he's been honest. It's up to you to sever your attachment to him (through zero contact) if he's not willing to give you what you want/need.