Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 16 of 16

Thread: Is it possible to have too thick of a skin Online Dating?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    California
    Age
    55
    Posts
    7,689
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by LHGirl
    Why aren't you interested in women in your age range?
    I am for sure interested in women closer to my age. I am certainly not one of those people that only put my preference lower in age. I received a message from a 60 yr old woman that looks interesting on the surface. I haven't had a chance to check her profile but I will keep an open mind for sure.

    Interestingly enough in real life I am approached by much younger women that I have chosen not to flirt back with just because they are kind of young for me and it seems silly to pursue it. In real life we don't walk around with a sign proclaiming our age like we do online so people just take you for what they see. I try and do that online...

    Lost

  2. #12
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    3,606
    Congrats! This is what dating is like when youíre emotionally healthy!

    Youíre going to have a ton of fun.

    Iím excited for you.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Posts
    2,526
    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    I was somewhat disappointed in not being excited about women in my age range on Match.
    Originally Posted by reinventmyself
    It was women that contacted him where he was out of their preferred age range, he was referring to.
    I was referring to his above quote, from his post # 6.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    21,375
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    My question about having too thick of skin comes from my feeling that I could care less either way what happens. When I did this all those years ago I felt like there was more urgency but now I don't have that in the least. I do want to have someone in my life and fall in love again for sure but I can't help but feel it is different this time around. I didn't intentionally prepare myself or physc myself into not caring as much so I am curious where it came from...
    Hello Lost, great to see you. Sounds like a combo plate of maturity, reasonable contentment with your Self, and removal of fantasy from the process.

    Maturity is a natural acceptance of 'what is' today--an accumulation of experience that buffers fears and takes some of the edge off of anxiety, which younger people confuse for excitement. Self-contentment allows you to view the process through a tempered lens that isn't driven by an urgent need to latch onto every potential contact as a life changer. Removal of fantasy allows for realistic and clear vision.

    You're in a good place, because you're not charging this up in ways that prompt people to view meeting strangers as saviors. You don't know them yet, so you're not psyching yourself up with the stuff that can only get in your way.

    Good job!

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    31,483
    Gender
    Male
    Agree. This is the best mindset to go into it with. This way, it minimizes disappointments and makes pleasant surprises more pleasant. Have fun!
    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    This is, in my opinion, the ideal headspace to be in.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    California
    Age
    55
    Posts
    7,689
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by catfeeder
    Hello Lost, great to see you. Sounds like a combo plate of maturity, reasonable contentment with your Self, and removal of fantasy from the process.

    Maturity is a natural acceptance of 'what is' today--an accumulation of experience that buffers fears and takes some of the edge off of anxiety, which younger people confuse for excitement. Self-contentment allows you to view the process through a tempered lens that isn't driven by an urgent need to latch onto every potential contact as a life changer. Removal of fantasy allows for realistic and clear vision.

    You're in a good place, because you're not charging this up in ways that prompt people to view meeting strangers as saviors. You don't know them yet, so you're not psyching yourself up with the stuff that can only get in your way.

    Good job!
    I get what you are saying and thank you. I have built a pretty good life and would like to share that with a special woman, not fill a void but to be a wonderful addition to each others lives.

    I guess this is a new place so it seemed strange...

    Lost

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •