I told my friend she could stay at my place now I changed my mind

I was pretty confident about letting my friend, her bf, and their baby stay at my place if they couldn't find an apartment by the time they have to vacate another friends place. They will be homeless soon. But I am SCARED about how all this will turn out. She is my best friend and their baby is my goddaughter. I was all in until a few days ago when she was telling me they were going out to eat at a nice restaurant and buying weed and cocaine. I was put off by that but figured they were doing okay since they were eating out and buying things but when she told me how stressed she was I asked if they called the places they applied to back and if they have been applying, she said no because they have no money. I was irritated and didn't even bother to respond to that bc they could have used that money to apply. They have been staying from one place to another at friends and family but they are no longer helping them anymore.

I just don't know how to say no now realizing that this is not a good idea. But I feel awful if I do say no. I guess I can lay out some ground rules if I do but I am just so irritated that they werent applying this entire time. I feel like when I offered they probably felt they had a cushion? I don't know what to say or do she has been calling me and I haven’t answered. I do have my family living with me and they arent okay with it but I did tell her a couple of weeks ago that they could stay if they couldn't get a place in time. I guess I screwed myself over and should have seen this earlier when they were going from home to home. I was just thinking about the baby and that they were just having trouble looking for full time jobs. But I hear them driving around buying drugs and going out to eat just totally changed my mind about it.

Any advice?

If you feel like this now, its just best to say no.

Lots of options - do you work or study? Say youre under a lot of pressure and don't have the headspace to deal with this.

If you don't work, just say youre suffering from mental health and need youre space.

Be direct and blunt, but this has disaster written all over it.

If they keep having crutches of places to stay, they will never look for places themselves. You are actually doing them a favour!

Say your current room mates said no. Simples!

I'd provide her with the number of the nearest homeless shelter to contact for an appointment with a case worker, and I'd tell her that a I won't allow people who do cocaine into my home. You may lose a friend, but it's a friend sho uses cocaine instead of taking care of her family.

Get them out of your house asap. They can apply for social services. Do not harbor these people when in fact they are drug users and neglecting their child. You're family is correct. No one should be 'ok with' moochers buying drugs and neglecting their child If you are concerned for their child call CPS. These sleazy lazy druggies should not be allowed near a child..

I was all in until a few days ago when she was telling me they were going out to eat at a nice restaurant and buying weed and cocaine. I do have my family living with me and they arent okay with it. they were going from home to home. I was just thinking about the baby.

Agree with the replies above. Dont let them in the door, you know it's a recipe for disaster. Give them the number of the local homeless shelter. Yes you may well lose a friend but they dont sound like much of a loss. They sound like moochers.

I also agree. This has catastrophe written all over it. Also, they have a baby and are buying cocaine and weed??? Not only would I NEVER let them in, I would have a serious come to Jesus conversation about the drugs and prioritizing raising that baby. My inclination would be to report them if they kept that up. Someone has to look out for that baby because they are clearly not. If you enable them, this will continue so I would direct them to services that can help them get a leg up and support them and then be done with your part. It was really nice of you to offer to let them stay but this would be a really bad situation.

You can tell them "sorry, there will be no drugs in my home. I will allow the baby to stay, but you and your bf must find another place" if you are worried about the welfare of the child.

Don't let them stay, and reassess your choice of friends. They sound awful!

Thanks all. Ive decided to not let them stay and am actually reassessing my friendships. I know that not all friends will be perfect and everyone goes through their own struggles but if they can’t make changes to their lives for the better and it’s been years of the same BS then it’s best to just move on!