Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14

Thread: Wife and I leaving the Big Apple

  1. #1
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    10,209

    Wife and I leaving the Big Apple

    My wife's been applying for places out-of-state for the next step up as an assistant director or attending. She's been very patient and selective, going to plenty of interviews and tours at various places later and she's just accepted an offer for a more remote location in Illinois. Being honest, after living in 8 different states since hitting adulthood, I can't say I ever envisioned it being where I ended up settling down, but they offered her an incredibly comparable salary to what she makes here in NYC, with this area being something like 50% the cost of living on its most expensive day.

    So right now we're actually looking at properties right across the border in Indiana. It's actually got me pretty excited eyeballing all these acres. It'll be good to have my own land out of the way to safely shoot, some land for some goats and chickens to start with, some tillable land to do some growing or at least lease out. Don't think it'd bring in too much, but I can still fill in some translation work remotely and spend more time day trading for income while growing the homestead. My heart sank a bit when she told me hers was set on this job, but after taking some time to really reflect, I've been ever increasingly pumped to be able to literally buy the farm when a lot of brothers were unfortunate to have to do so figuratively. We're planning on starting a family next year, and I think bringing all the lessons and experiences I've gotten in urban life to heartland will be a good complementing duo for the future little j.kids. Guess we'll see, though.

    More of a rambling and an update than anything. I very rarely have issues to post about, so I feel a bit bad if I don't throw some stuff out there so that I'm not just that jack ass jeering from the bleachers the entire time.
    Last edited by j.man; 02-26-2019 at 03:24 PM.

  2. #2
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,098
    Gender
    Female
    Sounds awesome!!

  3. #3
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    1,955
    Gender
    Male
    Since I always like your rambling I’ll ramble back.

    First off: congrats! New adventures! Chickens! Whatever made you who you are, it’s clear from your posts that you know how to live.

    I grew up—as an adult—in NYC. Moved there at 17, obsessed with all the clichéd ideas of becoming a “New Yorker.” The city was like a religion to me—or, really, a marriage. Saw her across the dance floor and said to myself: yes, this, forever. Blind commitment. All in. Zero doubts. Which served me well—for a while. I became one of those clichés I dreamed about as a restless suburban kid.

    Which leads me to why I’m sharing all that. Many years ago I was in a great relationship with an extraordinary woman who was dying to get out of NYC, and wanted to do it together. Being a bit of my own island, stubborn, and not mature enough to really hear her or understand partnership, I sort of dismissed these conversations. Eventually we broke up, pretty amicably.

    And what did I do? I left NYC after 17 years, and have had a blast since. Transformative stuff. Lots of fun. Blah blah. My story, still unspooling.

    While that relationship is long in the rear view, I do internally thank her for the little push. One of the lessons that surfaced over the years was how sometimes leaning into/going with another person’s needs can lead to you finding more of yourself. Like, I don’t regret being a stubborn dude back then—alas, it’s who I was—but she was so clearly right, saw something I didnt see. Moving forward I have a little internal policy to just say yes to a partner in these scenarios, even when the heart is sinking a bit.

    It’s still a hypothetical to me, since the partner search is ongoing, but guess I just wanted to share that since, well, this new chapter in your life is inspiring stuff to these ears.

    Don’t think you need it, but best of luck and all that.

  4. #4
    Gold Member thisisrichey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2018
    Posts
    587
    hey congrats! you guys are making an excellent move and what most of us big city dwellers are figuring out - life is too expensive in the big cities (or in the expensive states) that we get too caught up trying to stay above water to be able to sit back and smell the roses. i myself am tryin to secure a work from home job so i can move to a much cheaper area (CT... i now live in the Bay Area which is routinely #1 or #2 expense of living in America). So I'm hoping to secure a similar situation to you - secure a CA salary that lets me work from home and live anywhere, then move to CT (where my gf lives) that's much cheaper.

    Good luck to you and your family (future and present!)

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    10,870
    Sounds great!

    But...

    Let me give you just a few words of caution.
    My cousins sunk $500k into an 11 acre ranch. They said a lot of the same things you wrote. Wide open spaces, chickens, acres for their kids to run around in. Problem was, they were city kids who had no idea how to manage and maintain all that property. They became overwhelmed and tried to sell the property six months after they bought it but found no buyers. They walked away from it and took a huge hit on their credit.

    You most likely have more experience than they did, but if not, just do a LOT of research on what it takes to maintain a large property.

    Good luck!

  7. #6
    Platinum Member LC8328's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    1,046
    Gender
    Female
    Pretty freakin' awesome. Congrats! This sounds like a great start for your soon-to-be growing family.

  8. #7
    Gold Member mines's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    The Windy City
    Posts
    661
    Gender
    Female
    Congrats j-man! Exciting update! I live in Northwest Illinois (Chicago suburbs - insanely expensive but less than NYC!) and I drive through Indiana to visit my mom in Kentucky. Lots of bang for your buck house/land wise in Indiana....for sure! Your new adventure sounds cool - nice place to raise a family. Good luck to you and yours! I'll wave when I drive through :)

  9. #8
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    5,555
    Gender
    Female
    I grew up in Toronto, which is one big ass city! Moved to a small town at 25 then bought a farm at 30. 100 acres in mid west Ontario. People thought we were nuts, but let me tell you, the farm was awesome! All that land, the 14 acres of bush, the 12 acre apple orchard, the barn, the driving shed, and the peace and quiet and a creek running thru the back of the property! I thought I'd died and gone to heaven! It was a wonderful learning experience and a great place to raise kids along with chickens, turkeys, ducks, a few cows and some sheep, plus rabbits!

    I hope you enjoy your acres as much as I enjoyed mine!

  10. #9
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    21,684
    Gender
    Female
    CongrAts Mr. and Mrs. J.man!

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Snny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    6,359
    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Sounds great!

    But...

    Let me give you just a few words of caution.
    My cousins sunk $500k into an 11 acre ranch. They said a lot of the same things you wrote. Wide open spaces, chickens, acres for their kids to run around in. Problem was, they were city kids who had no idea how to manage and maintain all that property. They became overwhelmed and tried to sell the property six months after they bought it but found no buyers. They walked away from it and took a huge hit on their credit.

    You most likely have more experience than they did, but if not, just do a LOT of research on what it takes to maintain a large property.

    Good luck!
    Yep. I’ve lived in an agricultural area for a few years and have made friends with local farmers.

    Depending on where the land is it could be very expensive, even if its only 10 acres. You have to be prepared for these expenses.

    With chickens, even though they are easy to care for, they attract predators like nobody’s business if they aren’t housed properly. You’d be amazed how intelligent foxes and raccoons are when you think you’ve got the hen house locked down. And with goats, males are violent. Also you get any livestock, be prepared to get a large dog who will drive away the predators and pests. So really, be prepared with some vet bills.

    Ask local farmers on what to grow and raise: they will know the land much better.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •