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i’ve had the same fwb on and off for 2 years now, when i hung out with him last weekend he was very touchy which is unusual. he cuddled up with me while we watched a movie, played in my hair and even massaged my shoulders a bit. i’m not sure if i’m overthinking these actions or if he’s starting to like me.

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Overthinking.

 

Even if they mean something, it’s impossible for us to truly know.

 

If he’s telling you he is only interested in a sexual relationship it’s best to accept his words and accept what you agreed to. If you want more, walk away, but don’t stick around hoping to change his mind, it’ll just hurt in the long run. Been there done that. It’s not worth it and honestly you’ll be kinda surprised how quickly you can move on once you’re no longer accepting scraps. At its core, u less it’s mutual, it’s pretty insulting, you deserve everything you want and there’s no point accepting less.

 

Good luck!

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..... when you say "like me" my guess is you actually mean "wants to be my bf"? Because of course he likes you, you guys have been hanging out and having sex for 2 years... doesn't mean he likes you the way you want him to though.

 

If he told you he wants FWB and no more with you then believe what he says and know he won't change his mind, ever. If he wanted more he would have made it obvious a long time ago.

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There's a lot of presumptions being made in this thread. OP has not stated or even implied they want more out of this situation than fwb, simply that there has been a change in behaviour and they aren't sure if there is more to it.

 

OP it could mean any number of things or it could mean nothing. If you want clarification on the meaning of his change in behaviour best to ask him. If his change in behaviour is uncomfortable or giving you mixed signals you're well within your right to request you keep it simple and not confuse matters with too much affection.

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You're over thinking. As I usually say here, most people think that fwb is just sex and leave when most people on fwb arrangements also hang out, cuddle and are nice to each other and do relationship like things. But it's not a relationship. There's not commitment, future plans and an actual definition of the relationship

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There's a lot of presumptions being made in this thread. OP has not stated or even implied they want more out of this situation than fwb, simply that there has been a change in behaviour and they aren't sure if there is more to it.

 

To me it’s rare to want to know what little nuances mean for sh*ts and g*gles.

 

The poster in question stated: I’m not sure if I’m overthinking or if hes starting to like me.

 

Her verbiage is what led me to make the conclusion I made. They don’t sound like the words of someone in a panic because they want to keep the status quo.

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Hi there. I recently ended a FWB situation that sounds very similar to yours. The guy made it clear from the beginning that he was not seeking a relationship... however, as the months went on he began acting very sweet and emotional. He even gave me lovely gifts and cooked for me on the regular. I like yourself begin to think he "liked" me.... however, this was not the case. This was confusing as I began to have feelings for him. Do not invest your emotions into a FWB unless you know his feelings have changed. Good luck.

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To me it’s rare to want to know what little nuances mean for sh*ts and g*gles.

 

The poster in question stated: I’m not sure if I’m overthinking or if hes starting to like me.

 

Her verbiage is what led me to make the conclusion I made. They don’t sound like the words of someone in a panic because they want to keep the status quo.

 

We don't know the OP is a "her" either 😉

 

I'm just going from my experience and a change in behaviour from any kind of relationship would cause me to overthink what was going on with that person and whether it would impact our relationship. All OP can do is verbalise and seek clarification. He could have had a bad day at work and wanted affection for once or he may be madly in love with OP. Could be something or nothing.

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We don't know the OP is a "her" either 😉

 

I'm just going from my experience and a change in behaviour from any kind of relationship would cause me to overthink what was going on with that person and whether it would impact our relationship. All OP can do is verbalise and seek clarification. He could have had a bad day at work and wanted affection for once or he may be madly in love with OP. Could be something or nothing.

 

Well he/she said he so I took the minimal risk of assuming she is in a straight hetero relationship, could be wrong, male female the impression remain the same.

 

Right you’re internalizing this, I made mention to that in my original response but deleted it because I did not want to seem rude. Your mindset was a unique one based on your words. I personally didn’t think it was but again based on your words yes very unique.

 

The OPers may also be unique but much like my assumption of her being in a straight heterosexual relationship, until then OPer comes and corrects us or clarifies. I think it’s safe to give advice based on the norm. Until clarification is given every post is taken in that way...

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No, if he wanted to date you and had feelings/respect for you this would not have dragged on/off for 2 yrs. You don't need jerks like this in your life. Date boys who want a relationship with you.

i’ve had the same fwb on and off for 2 years now, when i hung out with him last weekend he was very touchy which is unusual. i’m not sure if i’m overthinking these actions or if he’s starting to like me.
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^^ I agree.

 

Being an off and on FB or FWB (if you want t make it sound better to yourself) means he likely was only "on" with you when he was in a dry spell.

 

However: None of us know one way or the other so... If YOU have feelings for him then talk to him and find out if its still the status quo for him or is he on board with advancing what you have together to something more exclusive and committed. End it FOR GOOD so it's totally off if you're both not on the same page. That is what people who love and respect themselves would do.

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we’ve only talked about our relationship once a year ago and we both agreed that we weren’t ready for a relationship then and there but haven’t talked about it since then

 

I don't think wanting a sexual arrangement has anything to do with respect - there can be lots of respect with a sexual arrangement of course! Since you say you are also close friends and you are comfortable sharing your body with him etc if you want to know if he now does want a relationship with you, I'd just ask him -no apologies or backstory or over explaining and I would do it in person.

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to clarify I am a straight female. I don’t necessarily have feelings for him or want anything more just wanting to know what these actions mean. when we were “off” it was due to me being in relationships.

 

So, does that mean that you re-initiated with him when You were in a dry spell?

 

What do YOU want? Figure that out and then have a discussion about that with him to find out if he wants the same. If you guys want two different things then do the right thing and stop with the off and on's and make it permanently off. If you both want the same thing (be honest with yourself when you decide what it is you want) then get get on with whatever that is.

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we’ve only talked about our relationship once a year ago and we both agreed that we weren’t ready for a relationship then and there but haven’t talked about it since then

 

to clarify I am a straight female. I don’t necessarily have feelings for him or want anything more just wanting to know what these actions mean. when we were “off” it was due to me being in relationships.

 

Why?

 

We dont do things without any reason.

 

If you dont want a relationship and you both already stated that, theres no reason to believe the status quo is any different.

 

Batya put it perfectly...

 

 

you are comfortable sharing your body with him etc if you want to know if he now does want a relationship with you, I'd just ask him -no apologies or backstory or over explaining and I would do it in person.

 

by your explanation of your open communication and your nonchalance about this whole thing there should be no question about asking him these questions.

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