Should I countinue a relationship with an expiration date?

I have been talking to this girl for about 2 months. She’s a pretty amazing girl. We originally said let’s take it slow, and we have. Over the past 2 months we have gotten really close to eachother. Kind of bouncing back and forth out of friendship. She tells me to much about the guys around her and her past. So I assumed friendzone but she told me otherwise. A couple weeks ago I decided to stop talking to her because I’m feelings for her were growing and I felt like hers were not. The night I was suppose to She told me how much I meant to her and how much she liked me. So I decided to hold on and try expecting it to ultimately lead to more pain for me. But actually it didn’t. Things changed, since then she has been so receptive to me. Wanting to hang out and talk all the time. Compliments, smiles, and advances. This girl tells me how much she really likes me and how great and sweet I am. But it’s one flaw. She doesn’t want a boyfriend. She says she doesn’t want a boyfriend. Said it might be me but not now. For me it’s like don’t hold your breath. And sex, she wants to wait On. We have done other things, that I can tell she’s really Into.but no sex, she wants to wait. honestly I really like this girl, I like the way she treats me, how she actually cares and how feels about me. I just feel this relationship has an expiration date. So I don’t know what I should do.

It's simple but it's not. You should listen to her when she tells you she doesn't want a boyfriend. If you want to be her boyfriend, then the two of you are incompatible and the situation will likely only get more unhealthy and painful for you. Walk away and let her find someone else to be a soundboard about her exes.

 

I know it's easier said then done but you won't be available for a relationship with someone else if you keep chasing someone who doesn't want you.

We originally said let’s take it slow, and we have.

 

She doesn’t want a boyfriend. She says she doesn’t want a boyfriend. Said it might be me but not now.

 

- She's on the rebound and not ready to love another yet. When she says she does not want a boyfriend, believe it.

 

 

I have been talking to this girl for about 2 months.

 

- if you two have been dating for two months, she would be in love with you by now, if it were ever going to happen.

 

Make sure you are dating others, because the best this woman will do is break your heart if you put too much into this.

So,

A couple weeks ago I decided to stop talking to her

you have shown her some distance, which appears to have excited her attraction a touch, but only to the point you re-engaged with her, and she started dictating the rules again. This outcome will come as zero surprise to most posters here.

 

She says she doesn’t want a boyfriend. Said it might be me but not now.

 

You are already in the friend zone buddy. Sorry to be so blunt.

 

So, If she finds someone she likes better, you will be forgotten, and she'll be in his bed.

 

Giver her what she wants. Walk away. Don't look back. You are a virile young person, and she is not giving you the relationship you want. Where is your self respect?

 

Cut her off. Block her, get rid of, her move on. She is just wasting your time.

She's just using you as a stepping stone...she likes the attention, and keeps her feeling desired. There will be a day she announces she met someone and ditches you. Stop hanging out with her. Be firm with her that, if she can't give you what you want, which is a relationship, then you must be moving on because you don't want your time wasted on crumbs and false hope.

https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=557298&page=2

 

Since it’s been a week I’m going to assume this is the same girl and my confusion continues. You are putting WAY too much into this situation, it’s sinply not rising to the level you have in your mind.

 

The girl according to you was playing games and rebounding? That’s been your history now because she thew you a bone you’re fully invested again?

 

You have got to do more to guard your heart man. I’m not saying don’t pursue this, I’m saying if you are go in with your eyes wide open, you ask these questions as if you have any control here you don’t you handed her complete control over you, your emotions and where all this goes and truthfully, if history is an indicator of future behavior you aren’t going to go anywhere until she decides to move on.

 

That’s your truth. Own it.

If she says she doesn't want a boyfriend and she's being upfront about it and you want to be her boyfriend, you should listen to her because even if you do manage to get a relationship out of her, who's to say she'll put her all into it? Especially if it's not what she wanted in a first place.

 

When someone says they don't want a relationship... As another woman, I get the idea that maybe she's working on herself and maybe she doesn't feel ready for one.

 

You don't want to be in a relationship with someone who wasn't all that into it in the first place. That's going to be a lot of emotional struggle on you and it'll annoy the hell out of her.

 

Have your fun but stick to what you want. If you want a relationship, find a woman who wants that as well. In some cases women want to be proven wrong or meet some magical guy that changes her mind about relationships but that's just in movies, she's being upfront and honest about what she wants and I mean you can stick around and see if she changes her mind but that could end up being a waste of time and emotion on a situationship that seems unbalancef.

When someone says they don't want a boyfriend—even when they're being affectionate and/or taking some clothes off—you have to listen. And I mean really listen, by which I mean just accept that as fact. Not a verdict on you, how much she likes you or not. And not a challenge to change her mind with your awesomeness and/or by giving her everything you've got emotionally.

 

No, it's just who she is and where she is right now. Take it or leave it.

 

I'm not saying there aren't cases where these sorts of things can't be enjoyed. But it takes a certain mindset and emotional control, neither of which I think you have right now. It takes really listening to something else—yourself—and being honest about what you hear and feel in your own spirit.

 

But to give you a sense of what that can look like: I was recently having a some fun with someone who "didn't want a boyfriend." Someone who was clearly going through some stuff in life, was all over the map emotionally, looking for a foothold, and no doubt liked the comfort and attention that causal romance could provide during a transitional moment.

 

She's cool, interesting, hot. Really affectionate, said all sorts of lofty things to me that, of course, were nice to hear. Also nice? Some seriously interstellar sex.

 

I liked her and valued her, sincerely. Knew she liked me, valued me, and so on. But I literally spent zero seconds wondering "where it was going," zero seconds fretting about any of it. I liked the comfort and attention, too, and could enjoy that with a limited emotional investment. Because I've been to enough rodeos to know what was what: this was a woman (like yours) searching for something more than me—searching in herself, searching elsewhere, or at least not wanting to close off the option of searching elsewhere.

 

So I enjoyed and respected what we had and who she was, not what we could be and who she could become if I "stuck it out." Wasn't closed off to the idea of it evolving into something more, but I wasn't going to push it there by putting on some show or tossing all my eggs in her basket. Oh no. I dated others, did my thing, kept plenty of space between us. Ended up meeting someone more present and available, and cut things off. She didn't love that, but she got it. Just like I wouldn't have been too thrown if she'd suddenly told me she met someone else or just needed to be alone.

 

What I'd do in your shoes is take some time to detach, and let this breathe. Let some of the emotions simmer down. Go on some more dates—and, in general, never stop dating even when there's a spark with someone who "doesn't want a boyfriend." That's a form of insanity, like trying to quench thirst by drinking from an empty glass.

 

Get your center back, because right now you've outsourced you center to her, and she's way, way too wobbly, which is why you're now blowing around in the wind. If you think you can do the casual affection exchange, reach back out. If she evolves and gets some clarity, she'll let you know. But if you're hoping that sticking around is going to be the source of that evolution and clarity—um, no. Never works like that, ever.

OP, you have started SEVEN threads about this same woman.

 

What is it you're looking for here? Was none of the advice you were given on your previous six threads helpful? Was it all completely useless to you?

OP, you have started SEVEN threads about this same woman.

 

What is it you're looking for here? Was none of the advice you were given on your previous six threads helpful? Was it all completely useless to you?

 

Whoa. Didn't see that.

 

OP, some real talk? There is no one on the planet who, after two months of sexless cat-and-mouse, deserves seven threads on a board like this. Time to stop focusing on her and get straight yourself.

Sorry guys I should clarify. I was talking to another girl as well. Their not all about her. But to be honest. I see it. I guess I just like to vent my frustrations

Sorry guys I should clarify. I was talking to another girl as well. Their not all about her. But to be honest. I see it. I guess I just like to vent my frustrations

 

Wow....it actually would have been better had this been the same women.

 

The scenarios are so similar its uncanny.

 

So either youre attempting to save face or you go after the same type of women over and over.

 

Either way, you should probably take a brief dating break and work on your self esteem and ability to be honest with yourself.

 

Much like your other situation you are not in control here, you are a passenger with these women and instead of dating to find someone youre equally yolked with you seem to be dating to prove yourself to women.