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Thread: Married 2 years now...wife's immediate family drives me nutts anymore

  1. #21
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    That's why I think an IC could help you. Not really with a ready set of rejoinders. Just in handling how you react.

  2. #22
    Bronze Member a_lifters_life's Avatar
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    Hmm, i mean, its not just about one thing though. Its about all aspects of life.. Ive tried straight out ignoring him, telling him off, but neither work. He appears content either way in doing it. So, its time for me to change the way i act and increase the intensity.

  3. #23
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    No, itís time to refocus on your wife and child on the way.
    Confrontation with BIL serves nobody.
    Last edited by jimthzz; 02-11-2019 at 02:36 PM.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by a_lifters_life
    Hmm, i mean, its not just about one thing though. Its about all aspects of life.. Ive tried straight out ignoring him, telling him off, but neither work. He appears content either way in doing it. So, its time for me to change the way i act and increase the intensity.
    Actually what we keep telling you is that you need to decrease your intensity and work on your anger issues. You are way over the top here and in the wrong. But it seems that you are fixated on hatred, determined to collect wounds and keep hating more. What are you thinking here? Do you want to end up punching him in the nose, end up in jail and then divorced too? Btw, any judge you come in front of will court order anger management counseling for you whether you like it or not. You are out of control and completely off base.

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  6. #25
    Bronze Member a_lifters_life's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DancingFool
    Actually what we keep telling you is that you need to decrease your intensity and work on your anger issues. You are way over the top here and in the wrong. But it seems that you are fixated on hatred, determined to collect wounds and keep hating more. What are you thinking here? Do you want to end up punching him in the nose, end up in jail and then divorced too? Btw, any judge you come in front of will court order anger management counseling for you whether you like it or not. You are out of control and completely off base.
    I get that, and what im telling you is ive seen someone before - and they didnt help.

    What im asking from the forum is ways to address this issue when it next arises. One is to not see them ever again, but causes its own issues with my wife.

    What are some others?

  7. #26
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Picture him with a Mickey Mouse custom on and just laugh at the whole thing. Use your own mental tricks to disarm him.

  8. #27
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Take it as the joke it's meant to be and laugh at it.

  9. #28
    Bronze Member a_lifters_life's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Picture him with a Mickey Mouse custom on and just laugh at the whole thing. Use your own mental tricks to disarm him.
    Good idea. Anymore?

  10. #29
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    Ignoring good advice because you didn't fully have success previously does not negate good advice.

  11. #30
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Yes read up on sports psychology, such as this mental technique to knock someone down to size in your mind. By keeping your composure, you've won the game.
    Originally Posted by a_lifters_life
    Good idea. Anymore?
    Last edited by Wiseman2; 02-11-2019 at 03:03 PM.

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