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My bf of 2 years has lost interest in sex


Marmitoad2

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In the past couple of months my boyfriend of 2 years has stopped being interested in anything sex related. Whenever he thinks, sees or does anything sex related he feels physically sick and recently he has stopped even thinking about it. On top of that he now says that sex is boring and is something only for teenagers. I don’t have much of an idea about what is causing this and neither does he. We have still been having sex occasionally, But only when we haven’t seen eachother in a few days, our reunions always result in sex for a few days with him interested but then he loses interest after 2-3 days and we then go months without. It’s not just me as he doesn’t watch porn anymore but he used to love it. He also tells me that he’s wants to want to have sex with me but he simply doesn’t want to.

 

The reason I have come for advice is because I’m struggling to come to terms with what is happening, I often feel as though he is not attracted to me anymore and this is some how my fault. At one point he told me that this is partly caused by me ‘stressing him out too much’ :/. I’m also struggling with the fact that we used to have a lot of sex and I still want that but he no longer does and I’m frustrated and wondering what I can do to stop that.

 

I would like advice on what the problem might be and how to fix it. But if this is something that doesn’t need fixing or is permanent then I would like to know how to deal with it considering I am still very much interested in him, am I just going to have to accept that I’ll probably not get to have sex ever again?

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OP, This is something having to do with him, so its his responsibility to manage not yours. Has he discussed any willingness or desire to get psychotherapy?

 

I do not recommend you resolve yourself to a future of little to no sex. For various reasons, I would expect your relationship to fail slowly and painfully. Sorry. Better to face it, let him know it isH't an expression of affection that creates bonding chemicals to help renew your affection. lf he has an interest in getting help, then I'd stay for a bit.

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Sorry to hear this. Do you live together? How old is he? It's not your job to fix it and it's also not your fault. He may be depressed, using drugs/alcohol, have medical problems, stress relates issues or cheating, etc.

 

This is his issue to resolve and his decision to seek medical checkups and therapeutic help. It would be best to break up since he is blaming this new asexuality/lack of libido on you and the relationship has become unsatisfying on many levels for both of you.

In the past couple of months my boyfriend of 2 years has stopped being interested in anything sex related.

 

he now says that sex is boring and is something only for teenagers. he told me that this is partly caused by me ‘stressing him out too much’ :/.

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