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Thread: Right woman to marry

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by micro
    Problem is that I am not attracted to her from sexual perspective.
    Disrespect may soon follow.

  2. #12
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    I agree with redswim and had similar experiences. Iíll also say you need not look for a woman who is beautiful looking by some external evaluation. All that matters is that you feel chemistry and passion. Sure itís nice to have arm candy if thatís your thing but arm candy doesnít mean the chemistry is right. Also you need to have that foundation of chemistry so if things are kind of in a rut temporarily you feel secure that you can revive the passion and you both want to and both know how. Let her find her person and you find yours. Good luck.

  3. #13
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    Dear all,
    Thank you for the comments, advices and help.
    Message what to do is clear.

    Now I will have to deal with the problem of how to find the right woman for me.
    I haven't succeeded it in 40+ years, so confidence that this will happen is not at the top level. Same with the motivation...

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Could it be you are too picky or find fault to avoid relationships/marriage? Are you sure you want to marry or is it just pressure from friends, family, society?

    Your exgf whom you broke up with then regretted it, recently got married. What happened there that you didn't marry her either?:

    [Register to see the link]

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Could it be you are too picky or find fault to avoid relationships/marriage? Are you sure you want to marry or is it just pressure from friends, family, society?

    Your exgf whom you broke up with then regretted it, recently got married. What happened there that you didn't marry her either?:

    [Register to see the link]
    Wiseman2, thank you for these questions!

    Breakup with this ex really was tough for me.
    Needed 4-5 years to fully move on. Eventually I moved to another country to forget.

    I broke up in first place because was under big pressure at work (was going through burnout sindrom), she couldn't understand..
    Another reason was that she is very materialistic - I was afraid that once during marriage when financial problems popup she could leave me, etc.
    In everithing else we were very much compatible...

    Do I want to get married?
    I guess yes.
    All my friends are married, I am alone and feeling that life is passing by me. It is good to have someone to share it with.
    But also, yes there is pressure from family, society...

  7. #16
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Problem is that I am not attracted to her
    It makes no sense to partner with anyone to whom you're not attracted. It does them no favors, and it's a miserable way to live--have you noticed?

    Most people are not our match. This includes the millions of kind and loving and otherwise lovely people in the world who would make someone ELSE a great partner.

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by catfeeder
    It makes no sense to partner with anyone to whom you're not attracted. It does them no favors, and it's a miserable way to live--have you noticed?

    Most people are not our match. This includes the millions of kind and loving and otherwise lovely people in the world who would make someone ELSE a great partner.
    Thank you for the advice.

  9. #18
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    Are you being realistic? Are you not as attracted to her because you are holding out for a woman who looks like a model?

    Or do you just feel like brother and sister?

    There is a big difference. If you think more of her as a sister and can't even picture yourself kissing her not because she is gross or ugly but because she feels like she is more of just a friend that's one thing, but if you are stopping yourself from being attracted to everything about her because she is not a perfect beauty -- well then you will never meet someone.

  10. #19
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    btw, why are you dating her if there was never an attraction? what attracted you to her initially and was your ex a great beauty?

  11. #20
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    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    Are you being realistic? Are you not as attracted to her because you are holding out for a woman who looks like a model?

    Or do you just feel like brother and sister?

    There is a big difference. If you think more of her as a sister and can't even picture yourself kissing her not because she is gross or ugly but because she feels like she is more of just a friend that's one thing, but if you are stopping yourself from being attracted to everything about her because she is not a perfect beauty -- well then you will never meet someone.
    Hi
    I am not searching for model.
    Also I am not looking her as sister.
    At the beginning she attracted me with her personality.

    All my exes were more attractive.

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