Yeah it was my swimming suit. Does that matter anyway. .
At least you guys didn't ghost each other lol
Yeah it was my swimming suit. Does that matter anyway. .
At least you guys didn't ghost each other lol
Yes it matters, it would mean more if it was something you knew you'd never use on vacay. Just send a text, if you get no reply then there you go.Originally Posted by h0000
Ok that makes sense. Why would you leave your stuff at his place anyway? You should take your stuff when you leave his place anyway. If you did leave something there and it's not important, forget it. If it is, text to set up a time to get it. Never use 'stuff' as a placeholder or an attempt to mark your turf. 🐶
Back to the point. Text him that you are back and suggesting getting together. Do guys ghost on you all the time? Why are you worried before you know that's the case?Originally Posted by h0000
Yes I think I have been ghosted before. Once, or maybe twice. Cant remember too well.
Well in the early stages of dating I always think people fade out easily. I think hes ghosted because I really cant think of any other explanation why he didnt reply. Also my mum said he didnt even offer to pick me up, its clearly hes bailing lol
As for my stuff, it was my bikini because we planned to go to the beach but I ended up not feeling it. So before I left he said "do you wanna take your bikini, in case you wanna use it". I knew I wasn't gonna swim but i took it anyway, I wasn't gonna say " no leave it here " lolz...
I'm still digesting my feelings towards his behavior..sometimes I feel like texting him and other times I'm too annoyed to..
A text message isn't really a lot to venture. If he doesn't respond, then you'll have your answer. If he does, you may learn that your one text from afar didn't get through or whatever. Either way, sending a hello message isn't any skin off your back.
Just text him you're back and ask to meet up. Anything you can do while taking a **** isn't something you should need to think so much about.
Ok, this^ is telling.Originally Posted by h0000
Many guys (perhaps some women but men more so in my experience) use a vacay, either theirs or yours, as a great opportunity to fade out with little to no drama.
I think he knew all along it was gonna be short term, six weeks right? Perfect in his mind. A few dates, some good sex, and then you leave and poof.
Which is why he made sure you took everything with you when you left his place, including your bathing suit.
If he had planned to see you again when you returned, I doubt he would have mentioned the suit himself. IF you wanted to take it, you would have.
Nevermind the future talk. That should be in one ear and out the other in these very early stages anyway. Not to be taken seriously until you have spent more time and established trust.
I have a bit of a rule for myself. When I first meet a guy and right off the bat he mentions he will be leaving soon for a vacation for a few weeks or months, I politely take a pass.
My friend had a guy tell her this, and after he supposedly left (soon after they had sex) she ran into him at a bar across town drinking with his friends!
Busted!
One of my brothers (the commitment phobe who I have talked about before) does this too when he just wants a quick fling. Tells a girl he's leaving in a few weeks for a long vacay. It's a lie, he just wants to fade out with no drama.
Just me but I just don't trust when guys tell me this. In this case it was your vacay, but he used it to his advantage imo.
Anyway, I could be wrong, but this is what my gut is telling me, considering the above quote and the fact he never responded to your message or has messaged you.
Typically I would advise reaching out one more time, but in this case, best to just let it go.
Last edited by katrina1980; 02-02-2019 at 01:41 PM.
Well, were you vacationing in a place where you might actually go swimming? If you were going on a ski holiday to the Swiss Alps or a trip to Sweden to play in the snow, then yes, suggesting you take it with you is a little odd. If not, then I don't see why it couldn't have been viewed as a sincere reminder to grab it before you go. In an of itself, I think it's entirely possible that you're reading too much into that one particular gesture.Originally Posted by h0000
Not replying to your text while you were away is more telling, in my opinion. Were you using a platform in which you can see if he'd actually received and read your message? I live abroad and I know my SMS messages are not usually delivered to my friends and family back home, for example. We rely on What's App to communicate with each other.
Well I wasn't going to ski but I wasn't going to the beach either. I could swim indoor if I really want. But i have other swim suits. But anyway He just said in case I wanna swim.
Regarding the message, it was text message, roaming. although not whatsapp, i'm sure he can get it. All my other friends can.
Another thing is that he didn't offer to pick me up from the airport. I thought if he liked me and wanted to continue seeing me he would offer.
So right from the beginning he wanted to use me as a fling? That's really mean isnt it... the whole time he was lying then? He could have just told me " im not looking for anything serious"Originally Posted by katrina1980